If I wear too much tartan, I tend to look like a Thermos flask. Ronnie Corbett More Quotes by Ronnie Corbett More Quotes From Ronnie Corbett A cement mixer collided with a prison van on the Kingston Pass. Motorists are asked to be on the lookout for 16 hardened criminals. Ronnie Corbett funny-jokescriminalsprison It is true that whisky improves with age. The older I get, the more I like it. Ronnie Corbett whiskywhiskeyage I wasn't a very athletic boy. I was once lapped in the long jump Ronnie Corbett athleticboyslong I certainly treasure the memory and indeed the picture, which still hangs in my house in Scotland, of Ronnie Barker and I with the Choir when we came to Wales to shoot our Welsh choir section of the "Two Ronnies" programme. You are very close to my heart. Ronnie Corbett heartmemoriestwo I think people feel starved of nice, glamorous entertainment. They want to see costumes and gaiety and a singer; old-fashioned entertainment - it won't die easily. Ronnie Corbett nicepeoplethinking I've had a very happy life, and although I have had tragedy, I've never suffered from any darkness. Ronnie Corbett darknesshappylifehappy-life I am happy most of the time. Ronnie Corbett i-am-happyi-amhappytime I have been trapped in some posh toilets, including those in Windsor Castle and Buckingham Palace, and at Victor Spinetti's memorial at St. Paul's Covent Garden, I got locked in the loo. Ronnie Corbett castlesometrappedgarden You get fed up watching shows with not much care and love, reality programmes where they put people in a house for a fortnight and film them doing everything, or where participants arrive after lunch and do the programme at six. Ronnie Corbett youlunchlovepeople I have been in the business for 62 years. It's a match made in heaven. Ronnie Corbett matchbusinessheavenyears It is possible to have good manners and be funny at the same time. Ronnie Barker and I proved that. Ronnie Corbett goodtimemannersfunny All those I admired as a young performer had a calmness to their comedy. Ronnie Corbett thosecalmnesscomedyyoung I just keep jogging along, and people seem to like me. And for that I am very grateful. Ronnie Corbett i-ammegratefulpeople Comedy taste changes. It only changes slightly, but there's always a different angle, a different attitude. Ronnie Corbett changesalwayscomedyattitude Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac. Ronnie Corbett thangoingyouidiot I love radio and have done a little bit for years - since 'Workers' Playtime' in the 1950s. It's also a good springboard for comedians. Ronnie Corbett goodradiodonelove As you get older, you worry about your memory. Ronnie Corbett yourmemoryyouworry Part of my style was getting into a muddle. Audiences think that's part of the act. Sometimes it might be - but you have to guess which bits. Ronnie Corbett thinkyoustylesometimes I'm always nervous. A classy comedian is full of self-doubt disguised with an air of false confidence. If there isn't self-doubt, you seem aggressive. Ronnie Corbett classyyoualwaysconfidence My first pet at home in Edinburgh was a dog my dad had called Glen. He was a small sheepdog and went with my dad every day to work as manager of a cooking centre, which made the children's lunches for schools. Ronnie Corbett dayworkhomechildren
