You may marry the man of your dreams, ladies, but fourteen years later you're married to a couch that burps. Roseanne Barr More Quotes by Roseanne Barr More Quotes From Roseanne Barr Legalize hemp and allow women to grow it and make food, clothing and housing for pennies from it and legalize marijuana too. Let women integrate their divided consciousness with a natural herb instead of doctors' pills that kill the liver. Roseanne Barr marijuana women medicine The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it. Roseanne Barr strong-women being-strong inspirational Half the world's starving; the other half is trying to lose weight. Roseanne Barr half trying world Excuse the mess but we live here. Roseanne Barr cleaning mess excuse As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband gets home from work, then hey, I've done my job. Roseanne Barr husband inspirational jobs Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the month when I can be myself. Roseanne Barr women humor time It's a big culture of mind control too, MK-Ultra mind control rules in Hollywood. If you don't know that, google it and look into it. It's really hard for artists to find their voice in the media. It's levels of brainwashing and mind control. Roseanne Barr media voice artist My husband says, 'Roseanne, don't you think we ought to talk about our sexual problems?' Like I'm gonna turn off Wheel of Fortune for that. Roseanne Barr wheels husband thinking If you spend all your time worrying about dying, living isn't going to be much fun. Roseanne Barr dying worry fun I don't really want to hang out with politicians. I'd rather go straight to hell, and not collect $200. Roseanne Barr hell politician want A lot of times nerds are really artists listening to the beat of another drummer. Roseanne Barr nerd artist listening I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on. Roseanne Barr mom mother clever I quit smoking. I feel better. I smell better. And it's safer to drink out of old beer cans laying around the house. Roseanne Barr smell feel-better beer Comedy is the only hope for humanity. Roseanne Barr comedy easter humanity Being hated and hunted and blamed for your own suffering makes people kind of testy, nervous, and on edge, and often fundamentalist and extreme. Bombs get thrown only when people cannot honestly talk together. Roseanne Barr suffering together people Everything here must be done twice as no one can do it right the first time. Roseanne Barr los-angeles done firsts There isn't a problem on this earth that a doughnut cannot make better. Roseanne Barr doughnut problem earth Being nuts is its own reward. Roseanne Barr rewards nuts My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be no war. Just a greater emphasis on military apparel. Roseanne Barr military running funny Humanity is a failed experiment, but I think I'm God and I'd like to start over. I don't want to die, I just want everyone else to. I certainly would not be lonely. It would be exciting never having to listen to another person again but just my own self droning on and on. That's why I write a blog. And I read it, too. Roseanne Barr lonely writing thinking
