Ronnie Shakes Born : February 21, 1947 Died : 1987 Browse All Authors Top 15 quotes by Ronnie Shakes My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. Ronnie Shakes doctors health august After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, 'No hablo ingles.' Ronnie Shakes eye funny years Sometimes the unexpected does happen. Once, this exquisite woman fell for me. After we made love, she gave me a check for a hundred dollars. I said, "Honey, I don't get paid for sex." She said, "This is hush money." Ronnie Shakes dollars doe sex I always wanted to be the last guy on Earth, just to see if all those women were lying to me. Ronnie Shakes guy earth lying A lot of people wonder how you can tell if you're really in love. Just ask yourself this question: 'Would I mind being financially destroyed by this person?' Ronnie Shakes funny-relationship mind people I spend money with reckless abandon. Last month I blew $5000 at a reincarnation. I got to thinking, what the hell, you only live once! Ronnie Shakes you-only-live-once funny thinking One question on hospital admittance forms really gets me. "Sex: Male or Female?" Do I want to be in a hospital where they can't tell the difference? Ronnie Shakes differences want sex As a teenager I just wanted to fit in, just to be one of the boys. It was tough. I went to an all black school. I went so far as to have them print my negative in the yearbook. I think it was the black teeth that gave me away. Ronnie Shakes yearbook teenager school I was going to buy a copy of "The Power of Positive Thinking", and then I thought: What good would that do? Ronnie Shakes copies positive thinking I was an ugly baby. On my birth certificate there was a listing for Probable Cause. Ronnie Shakes ugly causes baby I fear one day I'll meet God, he'll sneeze and I won't know what to say. Ronnie Shakes one-day god knows Where there's a will there's a dead person. Ronnie Shakes persons I like life. It's something to do. Ronnie Shakes aging funny Relationships give us a reason to live. Revenge. Ronnie Shakes dating revenge relationship I was going to buy a copy of "The Power of Positive Thinking", and then I thought: What the hell good would that do? Ronnie Shakes
