Am I not a fearsome enemy?" "You frighten me primally. Kevin Hearne More Quotes by Kevin Hearne More Quotes From Kevin Hearne You are telling me that your lawyer is a bloodsucking vampire? Kevin Hearne vampirelawyer Peace be with you," I said, and as I turned to resume my journey with Coyote, I added under my breath, "and asskicking be with me. Kevin Hearne coyotesjourneysaid On a Creep Scale from Hello Kitty to Cthulhu, I award it a Freddy Krueger. Granuaile MacTiernan Kevin Hearne freddy-kruegerhelloawards Gods can screw anything and anybody. For reference, see history. Atticus O'Sullivan Kevin Hearne screws Turns out that once you kill a god, people want to talk to you. Paranormal insurance salesmen with special "godslayer" term life policies. Charlatan's with "godproof" armor and extraplanar safe houses for rent. But most notably, other gods. Kevin Hearne specialhousepeople I yawned and stretched luxuriously in the morning. I make noises when I stretch because it feels ten times better than stretching silently. Kevin Hearne stretchingnoisemorning She switched from ecstasy to embarrassment at about Mach five. Kevin Hearne ecstasyembarrassmentfive The tendency of modern American women to exclaim 'Hiiiiiiiiiiii!' in soprano octaves and hug each other upon sight can be disconcerting to those unfamiliar with it. Kevin Hearne sopranoshugsight I'm not a proper anything. Majoring in philosophy kind of turns positive assertions into maybes. Kevin Hearne turnskindphilosophy I tend to vacillate between belief systems. Right now I'm kind of checking out the whole buffet, you know, and maybe in a little while I'll decide on what I want to put on my plate and chow down on. Kevin Hearne buffetswantlittles They'll have to bring in Mulder an' Scully, because there ain't no CSI on the planet that'll ever be able to explain this. Kevin Hearne csiplanetsable Here is how you know someone has had a good idea: Other people freely admit to their friends that said idea has changed their lives. Most people today will grant that fire and the wheel are the big two. After that, any attempts to rank the greatest ideas of all time are going to draw lots of argument. You’ll have zealots pimping this god or that on the one hand, scientists pimping Darwin on the other, and then practical people pointing at written language and saying, look, fellas, the reason those ideas have gone viral is because someone figured out how to write them down. Kevin Hearne firewritinghands Well o' course she's feelin' dandy! She's the mother o' God for the love o' Pete! Kevin Hearne wellscoursesmother My mouth gaped and I think I might have whimpered. The Norns had obliterated him completely—a creature they’d known for centuries—because of me. It was like watching Rudolph get shot by Santa Claus. Kevin Hearne rudolphmouthsthinking No, she knows you're here. She can see through the camouflage. But I think she's hiding something from me, and I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. Never mind. Just listen. Once she drinks the tea, she will try ot surprise me with something. She is waiting for the contrast to be fully in effect before she says anything. I knew I never should have let you watch The Wizard of Oz. Kevin Hearne hiding-somethingshould-havethinking Oh, I know. They’re dwarfs pretending to be elves. No, they’re not dwarfs either. Okay, okay, they’re “little people,” I’m sorry! Can’t believe I have to be politically correct when you’re the only one who can hear me. Kevin Hearne sorrybelievepeople You don't need to say any special incantation or sacrifice a stray cat or something first? Kevin Hearne sacrificecatspecial Bullshit, as you Americans say. He's Irish. The Irish say bullshit too. Kevin Hearne bullshit Mr. Tall, Blonde and Lightning Kevin Hearne talllightningblonde If I waved that in front of a museum curator, he'd promptly lose control of his salivary glands. Kevin Hearne curatorglandsmuseums
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