As I’m fond of saying, if you want to find utopia, take a sharp right on money and a sharp left on sex and it’s straight ahead. Penn Jillette More Quotes by Penn Jillette More Quotes From Penn Jillette I'm always surprised when the corporate world does stupid things, because they're often not very stupid in hindsight. Penn Jillette stupid doe world I'm an amazing mama's boy. Penn Jillette mamas-boy mama boys I've been fired from a situational comedy with a script they wrote specifically for me because of my voice. Penn Jillette comedy scripts voice I've never had a drink of alcohol or any drug in my life. Penn Jillette drink drug alcohol If I were trying to avoid embarrassment, I wouldn't have stumbled my way through 'Dancing with the Stars.' Penn Jillette dancing stars trying If there are two things Penn & Teller stand for, it's the truth & lying, although not necessarily in that order. Penn Jillette two order lying I think the media spends a lot of time fooling itself. Penn Jillette media thinking I think people under age 55 come to Vegas with a certain sense of irony. Penn Jillette vegas people thinking I don't think I'm made of the right stuff to be a politician. I think I'm made to be a loose cannon. Penn Jillette politician stuff thinking I get along so much better with fundamentalist Christians than I do with wishy-washy liberals, who want everyone to get along. Penn Jillette fundamentalist christian want I have a very specific definition of censorship. Censorship must be done by the government or it's not censorship. Penn Jillette definitions government done I have more contact with people who consume, for lack of a better word, my product than any other performers. Penn Jillette contact performers people I intend to do the Penn & Teller show until they pry my cheesy magic wand from my cold dead fingers. Penn Jillette cheesy cold magic I like things matching. I have an upright bass, a drum kit and a grand piano that's the same color. I tend to overthink things. Penn Jillette bass piano color I like to read in the dark. I like to go into the bathtub, turn out all the lights, and in the dark, read my books. Penn Jillette light dark book I love the feeling of shredded wheat. I love healthy bird food with a fun-to-eat feel. Then you spray them with sugar, and I'm there. Penn Jillette healthy fun bird I love the idea that horror and fear is a celebration of health and life. Penn Jillette health-and-life celebration ideas I never wanted to be a magician. I never wanted to be a comedian. I never wanted to be onstage. Penn Jillette magician comedian wanted If you like the stuff I do, my chances of liking you go up. Penn Jillette like-you chance stuff If you want to talk about magic, the stuff that blows me away is the stuff that's done close up. Penn Jillette magic done blow
