But love was always something heavy for me. Something I had to carry. Benjamin Alire Saenz More Quotes by Benjamin Alire Saenz More Quotes From Benjamin Alire Saenz The heart can get really cold if all you've known is winter. Benjamin Alire Saenz cold heart winter Summer was here again. Summer, summer, summer. I loved and hated summers. Summers had a logic all their own and they always brought something out in me. Summer was supposed to be about freedom and youth and no school and possibilities and adventure and exploration. Summer was a book of hope. That's why I loved and hated summers. Because they made me want to believe. Benjamin Alire Saenz summer believe book The summer sun was not meant for boys like me. Boys like me belonged to the rain. Benjamin Alire Saenz summer rain boys Another secret of the universe: Sometimes pain was like a storm that came out of nowhere. The clearest summer could end in a downpour. Could end in lightning and thunder. Benjamin Alire Saenz pain secret summer I didn't think it was my job to accept what everyone said I was and who I should be. Benjamin Alire Saenz jobs life thinking I think writing books is a way for me to work out certain issues. I write about what matters to me, always. Benjamin Alire Saenz writing book thinking I wondered about the science of storms and how sometimes it seemed that a storm wanted to break the world and how the world refused to break. Benjamin Alire Saenz storm life world Why do we smile? Why do we laugh? Why do we feel alone? Why are we sad and confused? Why do we read poetry? Why do we cry when we see a painting? Why is there a riot in the heart when we love? Why do we feel shame? What is that thing in the pit of your stomach called desire? Benjamin Alire Saenz confused heart life I got to thinking that poems were like people. Some people you got right off the bat. Some people you just didn't get--and never would get. Benjamin Alire Saenz bats people thinking Words were different when they lived inside of you. Benjamin Alire Saenz different I do that with all of my characters. They have one of the flaws I have, and I zero in on that flaw. Benjamin Alire Saenz flaws character I'm an ex-Catholic priest. I have such a complex relationship to Catholicism. On the one hand, if I called myself a Catholic it would have to be a very unorthodox one, as I just don't believe all of the teachings of the Church. But on the other hand, I'm an educated man because the Catholic Church educated me. It gave me something that is really important to me. So I always think about my faith. I always have it, and sometimes I can't talk about it, and sometimes I can. I am like an adolescent in that way. Teens are asking questions: who is God and what does it mean to have faith? Benjamin Alire Saenz teaching mean believe If you want to be a writer, you don't want to live in a comfortable place. Benjamin Alire Saenz comfortable ifs want Mostly, I think people are fake. Well, what do you expect? The fake world we live in conspires to make us all fakes. Benjamin Alire Saenz fake-world fake-people thinking For a moment, I thought of the word happy and it was a word that just, well, it felt like it was visiting me. I knew it wouldn’t last for very long and I’d be sad again and then it would be worse because it’s one thing to be sad and it’s another thing to be sad once you’ve been happy. Being sad after you’ve been happy is the worst thing in the world. Benjamin Alire Saenz being-sad would-be long I wondered what that was like, to hold someone’s hand. I bet you could sometimes find all of the mysteries of the universe in someone’s hand. Benjamin Alire Saenz mystery sometimes hands You are thirst and thirst is all I know Benjamin Alire Saenz thirst knows Water was something he loved, something he respected. He understood its beauty and its dangers. He talked about swimming as if it were a way of life. Benjamin Alire Saenz swimming water way I wondered if my smile was as big as hers. Maybe as big. But not as beautiful. Benjamin Alire Saenz smile bigs beautiful If you can quit for a day, you can quit for a lifetime. Benjamin Alire Saenz recovery quitting addiction
