From the very beginning I started with a beer and a cigarette because I couldn't figure out what to do with my hands. So usually I have a beer and cigarette and that's what I was doing with my hands because that looked natural and felt good. Ron White More Quotes by Ron White More Quotes From Ron White I only like the live audience. I don't even like to do standup where it's being filmed. Because it affects the way the audience responds to what you say, because it makes them uncomfortable. You have to perform in a light room, and I prefer a dark room. But I love to perform, and I don't really see myself doing any television at all. Ron White light dark television Barbara was actually Jeff Foxworthy's interior designer when we first met. So, not only was Jeff responsible for my success in my career, he also introduced me to the woman who I'm going to spend the rest of my life with, which, I think, makes us even. Ron White careers firsts thinking I don't even plan things until later, so no I got no plans. Ron White plans There are a million really good cigars, you gotta really float around cigars. It's not like being locked into a brand of cigarettes; at least to me it's not. Ron White locked cigar brands The biggest piece of advice that I give young comedians is: If it's your goal to get where I'm at, go do something else. Because you'll never get here. Never. The odds are so bad. Because not only do you have to be a really, really strong comedian but you also have to be lucky. And most people don't get that combination. Ron White odds strong people I believe everything creative is somewhat collaborative. If you're a painter and someone stretches your canvas, it was collaborative on some level. Ron White levels creative believe I'd rather do a really good small part than a really bad big part. Ron White small-parts bigs I have had a front row seat to observe Darren's success over the last few years and never fully knew the keys to his achievement. He has unselfishly revealed his secrets with The Compound Effect so that others can learn from his success. In my eyes, it is more valuable than gold! Ron White eye keys years We have hearing aids in order to fix our ears. We have lasik surgery in order to fix our eyes. People ... you can't fix stupid! Ron White eye stupid order You know, my first album, some of those jokes I'd done for twelve years because I couldn't throw 'em out. Ron White twelve albums years You can't fix stupid. Ron White you-cant-fix-stupid stupid I'm a comedian, and I like to work on my live show, and if I'm doing television, I don't have time to work on my live show, and I can become a lame comic, and that sucks. Ron White lame comedian television If you kill someone in Texas, we'll kill ya back. Ron White texas ifs I believe everything creative is somewhat collaborative. Ron White i-believe creative believe You wanna get the truth out of me, get me hammered. Ron White hammered truth I started selling out comedy clubs before I got to town with no advertising. I was selling out theaters just on the rumor that I was going to be there. Ron White rumor clubs towns There are two kinds of comics; there are the ones who build bridges, and then there are the people who walk across the bridges as though they built them. The bridge builders are few and far between. Ron White bridges two people You can't ride home on a bowl of goat. Ron White goats bowls home Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty... mine's putting in an express lane. Ron White death-penalty states trying I've never been one to look up the ladder. I've always looked down the ladder. As long as there's one guy down there, I'm fine. Ron White guy long looks
