He was born early. But he was born within a safe range of premature. Paul Reiser More Quotes by Paul Reiser More Quotes From Paul Reiser But you get past that and realize you have to let go of what you think you want. There'll be plenty of time for that later. Right now, go and be with that baby. Just play with this beautiful little boy Paul Reiser letting-go beautiful baby If a tree falls on your head in a forest and no one hears it, it still hurts. Paul Reiser hurt tree fall Jerry Lewis played on the very first season of Mad About You, and he played basically himself, but he was called some other name. He said he's never done it; he'd never done a half-hour of [sitcom] television. This was 1992 or '93. And I said, "Well how is that?" And he goes, "Nobody ever asked me." It's like the pretty girl at the dance; everybody's too afraid to ask. Paul Reiser mad girl names When I'm writing for a book, it's much more reflective process. I have certain things that may not translate well to the stage, but, when they're on the page, people can really get into them. My first two books were aiming to be funnier, but the third was more about deep exploration. Things about being a parent and growing older that I thought would be perfect for a book. Paul Reiser writing two book That's the nice thing about doing stand-up. There's no development, you just go out there and get an immediate response as to whether something is good or bad. Getting a laugh is the best measure of how well you're doing. Paul Reiser nice development laughing I can't get past the fact that food is coming out of my wife's breasts. What was once essentially an entertainment center has now become a juice bar. Paul Reiser bars wife past The most challenging part of being a dad is trying to postpone the moment when they realize you don't know anything. I love any sentence that begins with Daddy...? because it's implied they're looking up to you - that you'll have the answer. The truth is, I don't have any answers. Paul Reiser dad challenges trying Once in a while you get a moment of clarity - an inspiration - and they don't come that frequently. Paul Reiser clarity moments inspiration A friend told me to listen to my heart. Another friend told me to listen to my gut. Maybe I need an autopsy, because right now my colon is kind of iffy. Paul Reiser kind heart needs When you realize you would consider not having a child just so you could take an occasional snooze and be available to see Batman Retires the same weekend it comes out, you have to take a good hard look at yourself and acknowledge, I am a shallow, shallow person. Paul Reiser shallow-person weekend children New parents always sound like hucksters in a pyramid scheme. Anyone who has kids and then gets you to go and have kids gets a check from Huckster Headquarters. Paul Reiser pyramid-schemes pyramids kids By shrewdly linking procreation to an act likely to make you stupid with excitement, God has seen to it that Life does indeed go on. It's possible, by the way, that this is why God's name comes up so often in the middle of the act; it's a salute to the author: Hey, whoever made this up - thanks. Paul Reiser stupid names doe The most used appliance in our house is my 10-year-old son Leon's Xbox. Paul Reiser xbox years son Younger kids, they understand that things aren't so perfect with their father or with their mother. Paul Reiser mother father kids When my son said, "I can't stop thinking about girls," I said, "That's not gonna stop. Congratulations. You're in the club. From now until the day you die, one way or another you'll be thinking about girls. Paul Reiser women congratulations girl But the two of them together, broke my heart. Olympia and Peter, those scenes... When they're kissing in their 20s and then kissing in their 70s, that's what it is. And they had never met five minutes before they shot those scenes. Paul Reiser kissing heart two I remember my wife and I used to get on plane and see everybody else with their babies. They'd be putting strollers and car seats up above, and we'd think: Oh, please Lord, don't make us go through that Paul Reiser car baby thinking It's not like some movies where you're following a bunch of different stories you can cut around. There was nowhere to cut to. It's these guys. We're not cutting back to anybody else Paul Reiser cutting guy different Field of Dreams is the only movie - and I saw it in the theater - on an afternoon when I was on location somewhere, and there were like 12 people in the theater. I was just so devastated; I couldn't get out of my seat. And I sat and watched it a second time. Paul Reiser fields dream people I'd never directed before and this movie's too important to me to put in the hands of some guy who has never directed. Even if it's me Paul Reiser guy important hands