I found when I was a child that if I put the hurt into words, it would go. Jean Rhys More Quotes by Jean Rhys More Quotes From Jean Rhys I watched her die many times. In my way, not in hers. In sunlight, in shadow, by moonlight, by candlelight. In the long afternoons when the house was empty. Only the sun was there to keep us company. We shut him out. And why not? Very soon she was as eager for what's called loving as I was - more lost and drowned afterwards. Jean Rhys shadow house long One realized all sorts of things. The value of an illusion, for instance, and that the shadow can be more important than the substance. All sorts of things. Jean Rhys shadow substance important I didn't know, I didn't know, I didn't know. Jean Rhys knows And what does anyone know about traitors, or why Judas did what he did? Jean Rhys traitor betrayal doe Cold - cold as truth, cold as life. No, nothing can be as cold as life. Jean Rhys cold weather Now at last I know why I was brought here and what I have to do. Jean Rhys lasts knows The perpetual hunger to be beautiful and that thirst to be loved which is the real curse of Eve. Jean Rhys hunger real beautiful Soon he'll come in again and kiss me, but differently. He'll be different and so I'll be different. It'll be different. I thought, 'It'll be different, different. It must be different. Jean Rhys kiss-me kissing different I have been here five days. I have decided on a place to eat in at midday, a place to eat in at night, a place to have my drink in after dinner. I have arranged my little life. Jean Rhys dinner littles night I am empty of everything. I am empty of everything but the thin, frail ghosts in my room. Jean Rhys empty ghost rooms But why do you want to talk to me?' He is going to say: 'Because you look so kind,' or 'Because you look so beautiful and kind,' or, subtly, 'Because you look as if you'll understand....' He says: 'Because I think you won't betray me.' I had meant to get this mean to talk to me and tell me all about it, and then be so devastatingly English that perhaps I should manage to hurt him a little in return for all the many times I've been hurt.... 'Because I think you won't betray me, because I think you won't betray me....' Now it won't be so easy. Jean Rhys hurt beautiful mean I have arranged my little life. Jean Rhys littles He had discovered that people who allow themselves to be blown about by the winds of emotion and impulse are always unhappy people. Jean Rhys unhappy wind people Blot out the moon, Pull down the stars. Love in the dark, for we're for the dark So soon, so soon. Jean Rhys stars moon dark There are always two deaths, the real one and the one people know about. Jean Rhys real two people When I think about it, if I had to choose, I'd rather be happy than write. Jean Rhys ifs writing thinking Stephan was secretive and a liar, but he was a very gentle and expert lover. She was the petted, cherished child, the desired mistress, the worshipped, perfumed goddess. She was all these things to Stephan - or so he made her believe. Jean Rhys liars believe children If all good, respectable people had one face, I'd spit in it. Jean Rhys spit faces people But they never last, the golden days. And it can be sad, the sun in the afternoon, can't it? Yes, it can be sad, the afternoon sun, sad and frightening. Jean Rhys golden-days afternoon lasts Next week, or next month, or next year I will kill myself. But I might as well last out my month's rent, which has been paid up. Jean Rhys suicidal next-week years
