I have seen that grief can be very different for different people. While the range of emotions experienced is similar, the way we deal with those emotions isn't, necessarily. Meghan O'Rourke More Quotes by Meghan O'Rourke More Quotes From Meghan O'Rourke A death from a long illness is very different from a sudden death. It gives you time to say goodbye and time to adjust to the idea that the beloved will not be with you anymore. Meghan O'Rourke goodbye giving ideas Grief is characterized much more by waves of feeling that lessen and reoccur, it's less like stages and more like different states of feeling. Meghan O'Rourke different grief feelings It's a blessing not to be alone in your grief but it's also painful to see your parents and siblings in pain. Meghan O'Rourke sibling pain grief Sometimes you don't even know what you want until you find out you can't have it. Meghan O'Rourke what-you-want want sometimes One of the ideas I've clung to most of my life is that if I just try hard enough it will work out. Meghan O'Rourke work-out trying ideas One of the things about grief is that it can bring a deeper perspective into your life; in the end, it has, for me, though it's also brought sorrow. Meghan O'Rourke perspective sorrow grief With ferocity and extraordinary craft, Lizzie Harris has made a book of poems that resonates far beyond the personal stories it tells. Stop Wanting reveals, in every lyric, its author's profound metaphorical gifts. In its ironies and intensities, it brings to mind a writer like the young Sylvia Plath, though what is startling about Harris' s work is the way it combines those gifts with a muted, deft self-awareness. Most of all, these are wonderfully shaped, powerful, and surprising poems-a startling debut. Meghan O'Rourke powerful self book Television has never known what to do with grief, which resists narrative: the dramas of grief are largely internal - for the bereaved, it is a chaotic, intense, episodic period, but the chaos is by and large subterranean, and easily appears static to the friendly onlooker who has absorbed the fact of loss and moved on. Meghan O'Rourke grief loss drama I was not raised with religion, and I had no faith before my mother died. On the other hand, when she died, I did not immediately feel she was "gone." I don't believe she is in something like heaven, but I also feel that we don't understand much about the nature of the universe. So I hold on to that uncertainty, at times. Meghan O'Rourke mother believe hands I'm not much like my mother; that role falls to my brothers, who have more of her blithe and freewheeling spirit. Meghan O'Rourke brother mother fall Like my mother before me, I have always been a good speller. Meghan O'Rourke mother My mother never liked Mother's Day. She thought it was a fake holiday dreamed up by Hallmark to commodify deep sentiments that couldn't be expressed with a card. Meghan O'Rourke holiday fake mother Many researchers say the dominant emotion experienced after loss is yearning or searching. And while you might feel more anger early on, it's accompanied by a whole host of other feelings. Meghan O'Rourke loss feelings might My mother died of metastatic colorectal cancer shortly before three P.M. on Christmas Day of 2008. I don't know the exact time of her death, because none of us thought to look at a clock for a while after she stopped breathing. Meghan O'Rourke breathing cancer mother But when my mother died, I found that I did not believe that she was gone. Meghan O'Rourke gone mother believe And after my mother's death I became more open to and empathetic about other people's struggles and losses. Meghan O'Rourke struggle mother loss Many grievers experience intense yearning or longing after a death - more than they experience, say, denial. Meghan O'Rourke longing denial intense What had happened still seemed implausible. A person was present your entire life, and then one day she disappeared and never came back. It resisted belief. Meghan O'Rourke one-day persons belief Relationships take up energy; letting go of them, psychiatrists theorize, entails mental work. When you lose someone you were close to, you have to reassess your picture of the world and your place in it. The more your identity was wrapped up with the deceased, the more difficult the loss. Meghan O'Rourke letting-go loss relationship 'Hamlet' is the best description of grief I've read because it dramatizes grief rather than merely describing it. Meghan O'Rourke describing description grief