I have yet to see one of those Comedy Central shows with multiple standup comics that doesn't include someone the size of the Hindenburg. Dick Cavett More Quotes by Dick Cavett More Quotes From Dick Cavett Its fun for me to go on other folks talk shows. When youve endured the ups and downs and tensions and pitfalls of hosting, being a guest is a piece of angel food. Dick Cavett pitfalls angel fun Meryl Streep belongs on anybody's list of greats. Dick Cavett lists The idea that hunting is one against one is ludicrous. It's one animal versus the hunter, the manufacturer of the rifle, the bullet maker, the designer and manufacturer of the telescopic sight, the auto manufacturer who made the car the hunter got to the edge of the wild in, the maker of his waterproof shoes, the various manufacturers of his mittens, glasses, overcoat - and that's only the beginning of the list. The "sportsman" who shoots an animal should then make a speech, like the actor who wins an Oscar does, thanking the multitudes behind the scenes who made this "victory" possible. Dick Cavett hunting winning animal The information superhighway? That sounds like a place that's long and boring and kills 50,000 people a year. Dick Cavett long people years An effective speaker can do more damage or more good in a well-stated minute than an angry klutz could do in half an hour. Dick Cavett damage hours half Being the offspring of English teachers is a mixed blessing. When the film star says to you, on the air, 'It was a perfect script for she and I,' inside your head you hear, in the sarcastic voice of your late father, 'Perfect for she, eh? And perfect for I, also?' Dick Cavett sarcastic stars teacher Sloppy language leads to sloppy thought, and sloppy thought to sloppy legislation. Dick Cavett sloppy legislation language There were several things a Yale freshman was supposed to be able to do. You had to demonstrate in the Olympic-size Yale pool that you could swim 50 yards or be inducted into swimming class. Dick Cavett swimming yale class I guess the best advice I ever got or anyone could get for doing a talk show, though it has not been easy very often, was from Jack Paar, who said, 'Kid, don't make it an interview. Interviews have clipboards, and you're like David Frost. Make it a conversation.' Dick Cavett frost advice kids If I were running a campaign, I'd urge taking the mountain of money reportedly squandered on pizza, coffee and bagels and spending it more wisely - on a talented young comedy writer. Dick Cavett mountain coffee running You can, after all, reduce the reasons for watching TV to but two: to be lulled, and to be stimulated. Some people do one sometimes, the other sometimes. Some people do all of one or all of the other. Dick Cavett watching-tv two people The authority of depression is horrifying. I felt like my brain was busted and that I could never feel good again. I really thought that I was never gonna heal. Dick Cavett feel-good authority brain I get a kick out of people saying I was funny. Dick Cavett kicks people I've actually gotten so I don't associate television with entertainment very much. Dick Cavett associates entertainment television I feel sorry for the poor kids whose parents feel they're qualified to teach them at home. Of course, some parents are smarter than some teachers, but in the main I see home-schooling as misguided foolishness. Dick Cavett sorry home teacher Running my show is really like an actor being in repertory but where, in one day in one performance, you do scenes from a drama, a farce, a low comedy and a tragedy. Dick Cavett tragedy running drama Electronic devices dislike me. There is never a day when something isn't ailing. Dick Cavett electronic-devices dislike-me devices Lawyers work hard and, like us, they're human, many of them. Dick Cavett lawyer hard-work humans I'm not freakishly short. I had, on my show, used shortness as a joke subject; it didn't really bother me. Dick Cavett used shows bother Every writer knows that unless you were born gifted with either supreme confidence or outsize ego, handing in your work holds, in some cases, admitted terror. If that's too strong, at least fairly high anxiety. Dick Cavett anxiety ego strong