I love doing [stand-up]. I love making people laugh no matter how. Whether it's a commercial, or a TV show, or a reality show, or a talk show, or a special, or a book. However I can make people laugh, that's what I want to do. Kathy Griffin More Quotes by Kathy Griffin More Quotes From Kathy Griffin No, I love Montreal... I think I love Montreal more than Montreal loves me... I love the food there. Kathy Griffin montreal thinking I was a soccer cheerleader. It doesn't get nerdier than that. I was fired from the soccer cheerleading squad after one year, which I believe to this day is unprecedented. You have to understand, no one went to the soccer games. In fact, I believe part of my duties as a cheerleader was to bake brownies for the team. Kathy Griffin cheerleading team soccer When my pals in high school were starting to drink, it always looked unappealing to me. I would be at a big party and see one of the popular girls or football players completely wasted and puking and acting a fool, and think to myself, there is nothing cool about that. I never wanted to be that out of control. Kathy Griffin party girl football Life is adventure. Travel is adventure at a different address. Kathy Griffin addresses different adventure I do feel I'm kind of a magnet for crazy, and if there isn't enough crazy, I will insert myself in a situation that I feel has comedy potential. Kathy Griffin comedy crazy kind If there is a gay army, I am their warrior princess. Kathy Griffin princess warrior army No one teaches you how to do this. How do you let go of someone who you love so much? Kathy Griffin teach suicide letting-go I identify with the regular person, because that is who I am. Kathy Griffin who-i-am persons It is a challenge, with the global fame, to try to act like I put my pants on one leg at a time, when in fact I have Pippa Middleton help me put my pants on every morning. She's my lady-in-waiting as well. Kathy Griffin challenges waiting morning I'm not always in that good with middle-aged heterosexual men. Kathy Griffin middle-aged middle men When I'm going to see a comedian, I don't want to see them hold back, and when I'm reading a book, I don't want to hear an abridged version. Kathy Griffin comedian reading book Most people unfamiliar with the men in a new town might search for love until they find it. I picked out some guy on my second day in LA, who worked at the local bicycle shop, and handed my virginity to him. “You can fill a tire? Sounds good to me. Let's call it a date.” Needless to say he wasn't Mr. Right. Kathy Griffin mr-right men people Phoenix is great. I love Phoenix, .. I love Scottsdale. I love the James Hotel. I have a Kathy Griffin suite. I love -what's that place called? AZ 88. I had never had a cheese crisp, so I went to - oh, can't remember. We went to the State Fair, where I was all about the deep-fried Twinkie. I ate every deep-fried thing - oh, it was heavenly. I ate until I got sick. Kathy Griffin phoenix cheese sick I have what I call A-list moments, but believe me, I'm still on the D-list. Kathy Griffin lists moments believe I was raised right — I talk about people behind their backs. It's called manners. Kathy Griffin raised manners people If you see me on Friday, you'll see different material on Saturday night. Kathy Griffin friday different night I have to tell you, though, the sexism in late night talk is so profound. Kathy Griffin sexism night profound I don't like doing movies, period. Movies are hard. I like TV. Kathy Griffin hard tvs periods I do road gigs occasionally but I don't want to go out on the road for months at a time. Kathy Griffin gigs months want I can say whatever I want. So do not bring the kids. It's definitely rated R. Kathy Griffin apologizing want kids