I'm an Aries. I need everybody to like me. Eric Andre More Quotes by Eric Andre More Quotes From Eric Andre I'm a lurker and a creep. Women don't like me because I sleep standing up, like a horse. Eric Andre dont-like-mehorsesleep I'm an elderly Jewish lesbian trapped in a 33 year old nerd's body. Eric Andre elderlynerdyears I'm insecure, and I need the validation of strangers to feel whole. So, I need every single racist 12-year-old on the Internet to like me, or I don't feel complete. Eric Andre insecurevalidationyears A hole is a hole has always been my motto. Eric Andre my-mottomottoholes I can't tell if the world is worse now or if we just have more cameras. There are cameras everywhere, so now the world knows how bad the world is. Eric Andre know-howcamerasworld I will smoke crack before I die. I want to see what all the hubbub is about. Eric Andre cracksdieswant I think everyone is bi, right? There's no such thing as sexual orientation, or race, or gender. Those are all obsolete man-made concepts. Eric Andre racementhinking The president is the country's scapegoat more than the country's leader; the president has as much power as we think the president has. Whoever has the most money is the puppet master. Eric Andre leadercountrythinking I think we give human beings too much credit. We're primates, you know. Eric Andre creditgivingthinking Before The Simpsons, I was 4 years old, so I don't know exactly what I was thinking before that. Eric Andre knowsyearsthinking Do you think we're going to hit a tipping point and the world's going to end? Eric Andre tippingworldthinking Like I said, a sketch is one joke. They shouldn't really be more than a minute, two minutes. There are some shows where the sketch goes on for five minutes. It's like, "I get it! I'm already bored. I did like the joke, but I don't anymore, because you went on too long." Eric Andre boredtwolong When I'm watching South Park I don't think it's written by neo-Nazis. They know exactly what they're doing. Eric Andre naziparksthinking I feel like we put all the weight on the president, rather than distributing the weight to all of the elected officials. Eric Andre weightpresidentfeels Wonder Showzen is one of my favorite shows of all time. When I first saw it, I thought it was so funny and new and original and edgy and insane and subversive. I didn't know comedy could do that. Eric Andre sawsinsanefirsts You can't really feel the direct change from one president to another versus people closer to you in local elections. Eric Andre electionpresidentpeople I just grew up with it [The Simpsons]. The first season came on when I was 5, 6 years old, and the show evolved as I was growing up and got funnier and funnier and, by the time I was in 12th grade, they were at their funniest. Eric Andre growing-upyearsfirsts If the crowd is full of assholes, it's no fun. If the crowd is cool, it's great. Eric Andre crowdsifsfun I think part of it is the fact that they were kind of the first of its kind - there weren't a lot of cartoons for adults. People forget at the time that The Simpsons started out, it was controversial - the fact that they said "hell" and "damn" in a cartoon was a lot. America was in an uproar. Eric Andre americapeoplethinking Wonder Showzen was one of the first shows that realized each sketch, each segment is essentially one joke, and, once you know what the joke is, it's time to move on. Eric Andre time-to-move-onmovingfirsts
