[I'm] as broke as the ten commandments. P. G. Wodehouse More Quotes by P. G. Wodehouse More Quotes From P. G. Wodehouse The real objection to the great majority of cats is their insufferable air of superiority. P. G. Wodehouse catrealair Cats, as a class, have never completely got over the snootiness caused by the fact that in ancient Egypt they were worshipped as gods. This makes them prone to set themselves up as critics and censors of the frail and erring human beings whose lot they share. P. G. Wodehouse egyptcatclass I think the success of every novel - if it's a novel of action - depends on the high spots. The thing to do is to say to yourself, 'Which are my big scenes?' and then get every drop of juice out of them. The principle I always go on in writing a novel is to think of the characters in terms of actors in a play. I say to myself, if a big name were playing this part, and if he found that after a strong first act he had practically nothing to do in the second act, he would walk out. Now, then, can I twist the story so as to give him plenty to do all the way through? P. G. Wodehouse strongwritingcharacter Rex Stout's narrative and dialogue could not be improved, and he passes the supreme test of being rereadable. I don't know how many times I have reread the Wolfe stories, but plenty. I know exactly what is coming and how it is all going to end, but it doesn't matter. That's writing. P. G. Wodehouse narrativestorieswriting When you're alone you don't do much laughing. P. G. Wodehouse laughing And she's got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need. P. G. Wodehouse girlbraintwo The drowsy stillness of the afternoon was shattered by what sounded to his strained senses like G.K. Chesterton falling on a sheet of tin. P. G. Wodehouse afternoontinfall She had more curves than a scenic railway P. G. Wodehouse railwaysceniccurves A roll and butter and a small coffee seemed the only things on the list that hadn't been specially prepared by the nastier-minded members of the Borgia family for people they had a particular grudge against, so I chose them. P. G. Wodehouse listscoffeepeople I attribute my whole success in life to a rigid observance of the fundamental rule - Never have yourself tattooed with any woman's name, not even her initials. P. G. Wodehouse success-in-lifefundamentalsnames My motto is 'Love and let love' - with the one stipulation that people who love in glass-houses should breathe on the windows. P. G. Wodehouse glasseslovepeople I don't know if you know it, J.B., but you're the sort of fellow who causes hundreds to fall under suspicion when he's found stabbed in his library with a paper-knife of Oriental design. P. G. Wodehouse knivesdesignfall Flowers are happy things. P. G. Wodehouse happy-thingsflowerreality Success comes to a writer as a rule, so gradually that it is always something of a shock to him to look back and realize the heights to which he has climbed. P. G. Wodehouse congratulationswinningwriting When you have been just told that the girl you love is definitely betrothed to another, you begin to understand how Anarchists must feel when the bomb goes off too soon. P. G. Wodehouse bombsgirllove I know I was writing stories when I was five. I don't know what I did before that. Just loafed I suppose. P. G. Wodehouse fivestorieswriting I just sit at a typewriter and curse a bit. P. G. Wodehouse cursetypewriterswriting It is the bungled crime that brings remorse. P. G. Wodehouse remorsecrimeregret To find a man's true character, play golf with him. P. G. Wodehouse golfcharactermen It was one of those days you sometimes get latish in the autumn when the sun beams, the birds toot, and there is a bracing tang in the air that sends the blood beetling briskly through the veins. P. G. Wodehouse autumnairblood
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