I'm not an artist. I tell inappropriate stories and jokes and I try to make people laugh. Kathy Griffin More Quotes by Kathy Griffin More Quotes From Kathy Griffin So yes, I say things I regret constantly, and I just can't help it. Kathy Griffin i-regretregrethelping I'll be honest, there's a part of me that does think I'm held to a different standard than my contemporaries and peers, and it's a little frustrating. Kathy Griffin differentdoethinking The beauty about the D-list is that people who are on it probably don't know they are. Kathy Griffin listsknowspeople My act is based on my life. Kathy Griffin Well, the coffeehouse audiences never know what they're going to get, and all the comics are different, as opposed to when you go to a club, and they're pretty much all telling jokes with set-ups and punchlines. Coffeehouse audiences are the most forgiving: They really listen, which is the best part. Kathy Griffin clubsforgivingdifferent I believe fully in making fun of children. I believe very strongly that you should never make fun of an embryo or your ovaries. I am a big believer on breaking those rules. It's a case-by-case basis. But the thing is, there's so many ways to make a joke about something that is sort of maybe verboten or something. Kathy Griffin funbelievechildren I certainly immerse myself in as many crazy Hollywood events as I can because you never know where you can pick up material. Kathy Griffin hollywoodeventscrazy I am what you call a non-believer. I don't even want to say I'm an atheist because frankly I don't want to join their club either. But the point is, I am a fallen catholic, I'm not religious, and that's all well and good. Kathy Griffin catholicatheistreligious I prefer big Oprah. I know Oprah wants to be skinny Oprah, but her head is too gigantic to fit on a skinny body. She has to accept that, like Kirstie Alley, she was meant to be... ahm... voluptuous! Kathy Griffin were-meant-to-bebodywant My act has always reflected what's going on in my life. Kathy Griffin I think a Celebrity Survivor would be great. Kathy Griffin survivorwould-bethinking I'm basically always on tour. Kathy Griffin journey The thing that cracks me up is how these reality characters start out thrilled and excited just to be on television, and how they move to thinking they are as big as the Friends. Kathy Griffin characterrealitymoving That's what I loved about Temptation Island. I don't even know why they did it. Kathy Griffin temptationknowsislands Well, Jon Hamm isn't a real celebrity. Kathy Griffin wellsreal Always and Forever is a Grandmothers love Kathy Griffin always-and-forevergrandmotherforever When I see you, I smile. When I touch you, I feel you. When I kiss you, I love you! Kathy Griffin i-smilei-love-youkissing I'm saying that she (Whitney Houston) looks great for a singer... the way Courtney Love is a singer. Kathy Griffin houstonlove-islooks It was sweaty Whitney (Houston) in Central Park. She knew that park pretty well. Every bush! Kathy Griffin central-parkhoustonparks I'm also doing a special for Comedy Central called Autobiography. It's going to be a spoof of Biography. Kathy Griffin comedybiographiesspecial
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