I'm not gay, so I don't know much about Broadway musicals. Norm MacDonald More Quotes by Norm MacDonald More Quotes From Norm MacDonald Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form. Norm MacDonald envy form mirrors The vanity of being asked advice often makes us confirm the opinion of those that consult us. Norm MacDonald vanity opinion advice Some men are tempted to violate secrecy from the uneasiness secrecy gives them, and others, merely to impress you with the extent of their confidence. Norm MacDonald secrecy giving men The young compliment their greatness on the number of their friends; the old, on the confidence of them. Norm MacDonald friends greatness numbers Man, them engagement rings, boy, they cost a lot. I was looking at 'em. Cost like a thousand bucks, two thousand bucks, y'know. Three thousand bucks. Something like that- four thousand bucks. Big number divisible by a thousand, anyways. Norm MacDonald men boys two Most men appear wiser in their doubts than in their belief. Norm MacDonald belief doubt men This is a thing I read by a scientist... it said scientists now say that a man thinks about sex once every 7.3 seconds. Now, I know what I think every 7.3 seconds. It's just a bunch of meaningless gibberish. Norm MacDonald men sex thinking Women of no beauty may yet be flattered to believe they possess some; others of a moderate share that they have a great deal; but those of elegance and charm generally know the perfection of their external graces so well, that they seem to covet that flattery most which heightens the opinion of their wit and judgment. Norm MacDonald grace perfection believe You can't love your team without hating another team. Norm MacDonald team hate I guess [Richard] Pryor was that good. I never saw him in a theater, but I imagine he was that good, because he was such a phenomenal actor. Norm MacDonald saws imagine actors RIP Amy Winehouse. We lost a true heroin addict today. Norm MacDonald amy rip today I can't be naturalistic enough to make it sound real. So instead, I just wander around aimlessly knowing that I'll be funny enough with stream of consciousness until I get to the actual explosively funny part. Norm MacDonald knowing real sound In love, we are best pleased when we please others. Norm MacDonald please love The most frequent cause of regret for what we have done is because its effects interfere with what we would do. Norm MacDonald regret causes done Laws, however divine in origin and institution, would be found of little coercion among men, were the administration of them not committed to mortals. Norm MacDonald would-be law men If you watch that show and you didn't know it was called Seinfeld, you'd think it was called 'The George Costanza Show'. Norm MacDonald shows watches thinking I just got back from New York. You ever been there? There was a big gay parade going on there when I was there, and I never been to one of them, and I like a parade. I always like a parade. So, I go there, and it turns out, it's just a bunch of gay guys. Norm MacDonald gay guy new-york I've always been very averse to innuendo, especially sexual. I find it cowardly or something. Norm MacDonald innuendo cowardly During misfortunes, nothing aggravates our condition more, than to be esteemed deserving of them. Norm MacDonald deserving conditions misfortunes Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them. Norm MacDonald lasts over-you may