If Iraq's weapons are weapons of mass destruction, surely ours are weapons of growth and nurturing. Greg Proops More Quotes by Greg Proops More Quotes From Greg Proops Tequila is like acid in a glass. Greg Proops tequila acid glasses My feeling is, we ran from animals for three million years. It's our time now. If a cow could eat you, it would. And it wouldn't care how comfortable your truck ride over was, either. Greg Proops feelings animal years I have to hear this all the time in England: Well, all Americans are fat and stupid, mm-hm-hm-hm-hm. Really? Well, thanks for sending over the best and brightest to start the party. Maybe we can send a few freaky, Texas, militia, hate-group, gun-toting weirdoes back to your country. Greg Proops hate stupid country I just feel like history is very much alive and important and I don't, you know, I can't worry about whether people get it or not, per se. Greg Proops important worry people Don't say 'No,' say 'Gilbert,' ladies and gentlemen. Greg Proops ladies-and-gentlemen gentleman I thought the Egyptians had cured baldness. Greg Proops baldness I don't want comedy to be Bridesmaids 2. I'm not denigrating Bridesmaids but, enough already, let's stop pretending women are incalculably different to us. Seeking out podcasts, listening on headphones, it's like an intimate, specific conversation. People respond if it feels from the heart. I'm as neurotic a human being as lives, and I have my faults. I'm a drunk. But people really like that. Greg Proops enough-already heart people I don't come on to seduce the audience. I don't care if everyone laughs. I can't think about that anymore. If there's anything that a lot of experience on stage and a lot of stage time gives you is the confidence to know that it's ok if they're not laughing every second you're up there. Although that's what drives me and I still go too fast a lot of the time. Greg Proops confidence giving thinking I work for a few at home who are devoted. People who are up now. Either they have some sort of bladder problem or they're extremely drunk. This is my crowd, these are the people I hope to get. Greg Proops drunk home people How would you like to make money in real estate? Greg Proops estates making-money real President Clinton celebrates the first casual Friday at the white house by wearing leather chaps. Greg Proops friday white house If you have a funny costume, you can't really wear it when you get older. Greg Proops costumes ifs
