It's like they say in the Internet world — if you're doing the same thing today you were doing six months ago, you're doing the wrong thing. Parents can learn a lot from that. Bruce Feiler More Quotes by Bruce Feiler More Quotes From Bruce Feiler Here's a confession: I hate parenting books. I hate the ones that are earnest and repetitive. Bruce Feiler confession hate book Even Superman's name reflects his creators' biblical knowledge. Bruce Feiler creator biblical names I'm a fifth generation Jew from the South, and I would say that I felt this connection to my religion, but it wasn't a spiritual connection. Bruce Feiler connections generations spiritual One question hovers over all of us who choose to spend our lives writing: why keep doing this in a world where so many forces are aligned against us? Bruce Feiler force writing world The most successful families embrace and elevate their family history, particularly their failures, setbacks and other missteps. Bruce Feiler family-history embrace successful Tired of nagging your kids to hurry up, get dressed, drink their milk and brush their teeth? Here's a radical idea: Don't. Bruce Feiler tired kids ideas I had always believed that I left a bit of me wherever I went. I also believed that I took a bit of every place with me. Bruce Feiler always-believe bits left Love is a story we tell with another person. It's cocreation through conarration. When you hit bumps in the road and challenges, you write a new chapter in your story together. Love is the constant act of revising and retelling your own story in real time. You don't do it by yourself. You do it with someone else. The only way you do that is to talk to each other and create a shared narrative. Bruce Feiler real writing love-is I was so naive about writing, I went to the public library and checked out the only volume they had on the topic - an academic treatise about publishing from the WWII era. Bruce Feiler library eras writing Moses became Americas true founding father because he evangelized action; he justified risk. He gave ordinary people the courage to live with uncertainty. Bruce Feiler risk father people Decades of research have shown that most happy families communicate effectively. But talking doesn't mean simply 'talking through problems,' as important as that is. Talking also means telling a positive story about yourselves. Bruce Feiler important talking mean When it comes to gender, marriage, family, work, and religion - we once thought of them as being fixed, but they're incredibly fluid. The same is true for love. Love was not something that was originally built between two equal partners in a relationship. It's something that's been hard-earned over time. Bruce Feiler gender equal The way to tell a really big story, I think, is to tell a really small story. Bruce Feiler stories way thinking The bottom line: If you want a happier family, bring those skeletons out of the closet. Bruce Feiler skeletons lines want Religion is increasingly a woman's domain in America. Bruce Feiler domain america When you hit the unimaginable, the only answer is imaginativeness. You have to heal with the person that you're suffering with. You have to write a new chapter in your story. A relationship can be a sacred thing, but it's going to be difficult. There are going to be challenges. You are going to have pain. But working it through and being resilient is as sacred and meaningful as having a "Hollywood" romance. Bruce Feiler pain writing meaningful Our instinct as parents is to order our kids around — it's easier, and frankly, we're usually right. [But] reverse the waterfall as much as possible. Enlist the children in their own upbringing. Bruce Feiler order kids children Take a walk with a turtle. And behold the world in pause. Bruce Feiler turtles walks world Knowing more about family history is the single biggest predictor of a child's emotional well-being. Grandparents can play a special role in this process, too. Bruce Feiler emotional play children Social media is fine, but we need to put the phones down and look somebody in the eye. Talk to your neighbor. Talk to your community. Especially talk to the one you love. It's all about connection. It's hard, but it's ultimately what gives us meaning in the world. Bruce Feiler community eye giving