Midnight, and the kitties are sleeping. David Letterman More Quotes by David Letterman More Quotes From David Letterman Tim Tebow may be back in the NFL with the Philadelphia Eagles. As you remember, he was thrown out of the league when he landed his gyrocopter on the White House lawn. David Letterman nfl eagles white Jeb Bush has to distance himself from what they call the Bush brand. So he keeps saying, 'I am my own man.' But when Governor Chris Christie is out on the campaign trail, he's always saying, 'I'm my own man, plus another guy.' David Letterman distance guy men Today is Earth Day. The way I see it, as humans the very least we can do is recycle. A lot of recycling is going on this year. For example, Bushes and Clintons. David Letterman earth-day example years John Kerry says the 'W' in George W. Bush stands for 'Wrong.' But he still can't explain what John Kerry stands for. David Letterman john-kerry stills What a day. It's 53 and gloomy - like President Obama. David Letterman president-obama gloomy president People say we need royalty. We have royalty in the United States - the Kardashians. David Letterman united-states people needs Prince William and Kate Middleton are in New York City. We have got to do something about immigration. David Letterman immigration cities new-york The new CIA torture report is 6 million pages long. It's almost as long as a George Clooney pre-nup. David Letterman torture pages long There's a rumor that President George Bush had a nose job, that he had some kind of plastic surgery, that he actually had a nose job. If this is true, that's the first new job he's created since taking office. David Letterman rumor office jobs Guess who's running for president? Jeb Bush. Jeb was governor of Florida and he speaks fluent Spanish, which raises the question: What language did his brother speak? What was that? David Letterman florida brother running The Bush campaign for re-election has officially begun. They're actually running television commercials. Have you seen any of the television commercials? In one of the commercials, you see George Bush for thirty seconds. In another commercial, you get to see George Bush for sixty seconds - kind of like his stint in the National Guard. David Letterman television-commercials campaigns running Those North Korean hackers are at it again. Earlier today they leaked Santa's naughty list. David Letterman santa naughty today You probably heard about the big prisoner swap with Cuba. A man who has been incarcerated in Havana for five years is back home in the United States. And we sent them some prisoners. The deal still has to be approved by President Obama and Bud Selig. David Letterman home men years Father's Day: When you get that lethal combination of alcohol and new power tools. David Letterman alcohol tools father Today was opening day for the new Congress in Washington. And Vice President Joe Biden swore in the new batch of White House fence jumpers. David Letterman president white house Enron CEO Kenneth Lay has apparently just slipped across the border into Pakistan. David Letterman ceo pakistan borders John Kerry went duck hunting and he's doing that to fulfill his campaign pledge to hunt down the ducks and kill them wherever they are! Kerry did pretty well; he came back with four ducks and three Purple Hearts. David Letterman purple hunting heart Mayor de Blasio wants to eliminate garbage. He believes New York City produces way too much garbage. Well, heck, forget about producing too much garbage. What about late-night talk shows? David Letterman new-york night believe There's a turkey shortage. Are you aware of that fact? There's also a gravy shortage. It's up to $4 a gallon. Governor Chris Christie wants to build a gravy pipeline. David Letterman turkeys pipeline want The White House has now put together a website for kids. It's a website to teach kids how to manage a budget responsibly. The website is called ' Irony.gov. ' David Letterman white house kids
