Modern Americans behave as if intelligence were some sort of hideous deformity. Frank Zappa More Quotes by Frank Zappa More Quotes From Frank Zappa It is always advisable to be a loser if you cannot become a winner Frank Zappa winner loser ifs The language and concepts contained herein are guaranteed not to cause eternal torment in the place where the guy with the horns and pointed stick conducts his business Frank Zappa causes guy business If you pick up a guitar and it says, 'take me, I'm yours,' then that's the one for you Frank Zappa take-me picks guitar I don't expect that Albert Gore is going to become president, and I certainly hope we never see Tipper Gore in the White House. Can you imagine Tipper saying, "Just say no"? Frank Zappa president white house Guitar playing, as currently understood, has more to do with sports than it does to do with music. It's an Olympic challenge type of situation. The challenges are in the realm of speed, redundancy, choreography, and grooming... ...clouds of educated gnat-notes. Frank Zappa music clouds sports Classical music is this music that was written by a bunch of dead people a long time ago. Frank Zappa music long people I searched for years I found no love. I'm sure that love will never be a product of plasticity. Frank Zappa found love years Basically I'm in the idea business -- whether it's a musical idea or a spoken idea ... If you wind up with a political system that wants to put idea men out of business, then you have worry on your hands. Frank Zappa wind men hands Find you a bridge and take a jump. Just make certain you do it right the first time, cause nothing's worse than a suicide chump. Frank Zappa suicide bridges firsts Out on a 30 day tour, you got nothing, but groupies and promoters to love you. Frank Zappa groupie rock-and-roll love-you Okay, it was the Tree of Knowledge. "You eat this apple; you're going to be as smart as God." We can't have that. Frank Zappa apples smart tree My guitar wants to kill your mama. Frank Zappa rock-and-roll guitar want She was a steady date until she put on some weight. Frank Zappa steady weight I think that people are entitled to be amused, and entertained. If they see deviations from this classical norm, it's probably good for their mental health. Frank Zappa mental-health people thinking I proceeded to take that mitten full of the deadly yellow snow crystals and rub it all into his beady little eyes with a vigorous circular motion. Frank Zappa eye revenge yellow This is a stupid song and that's the way I like it. Frank Zappa honesty stupid song What kind of man can name a child Moon Unit? Frank Zappa moon men children Love of my life, I love you so. Love of my life, don't ever go. Frank Zappa love-of-my-life love-you romantic You can't escape the puking sphinx. Frank Zappa sphinx One and one is eleven. Frank Zappa eleven dense