My dog has a cough. If you've never seen a dog with a cough, I recommend trying to find one. It's hilarious. Zach Braff More Quotes by Zach Braff More Quotes From Zach Braff I really do take more vacations than the president. You can quote me on that. Zach Braff vacationpresident I'd like to think that my scripts are more significant than maybe the Bible or the book that the Jews use, whatever it's called. And that's only when I'm having an off day. Zach Braff usebookthinking I think we have to acknowledge that people are different and succeed at different things, first of all. Men are better than women at some professions like firefighting, construction work, and physics. But women are better than men at some professions, too, like elementary teaching, prostitution, and giving birth. Who's to say which is more important? Zach Braff teachingmenthinking Hitler had the right idea. He was just an underachiever. Zach Braff right-ideasideas I'm not actually an arrogant guy. It's just that, truthfully, nobody else can really compare to me. Zach Braff arrogantcompareguy When I was told they wanted the show to be about doctors, I was a bit reluctant to sign on, you know? I thought, why have a show about doctors when we could have a show about the real heroes, you know, like me? Zach Braff doctorsrealhero I'm not saying eating babies should be legal, but when they're so delicious, what's the harm in it? I don't know what tastes better, their innocence or their gooey rib butter. Zach Braff ribstastebaby I've always preferred Marvel over DC. I just relate to their characters better. I mean look at Wolverine, at first he was just a bit player in an ensemble cast. Now he's the only reason people read X-Men. Just like me and Scrubs. Zach Braff playercharactermean It's really hard to find parts that challenge me as an actor these days. At this point in my career, I feel like I can just sleepwalk through most of my roles and still do a better job than 90 percent of the actors out there. Zach Braff careerschallengesjobs Its not that I'm in love with myself, I'm just trying to pick up everyone else's slack. Zach Braff pickstrying I don't even like the show that much, I mean, it's about doctors. It's not like doctors are as important as actors anyway, I bet I've saved more lives with my acting talent then any doctor has. Zach Braff doctorsimportantmean Some people just can't handle that they will never be a better actor than me Zach Braff handleactorspeople I mean, I understand that Scrubs was my big break, but sooner or later you have to move on. I've already directed a movie, which received very good reviews, so it just seems much more important to me now. I feel that in order to better foster my creativity as an actor and director at this point, I need to be surrounded by other talented, artistic individuals, instead of just goofy comedians. Zach Braff creativitymeanmoving I don't have anything against this Jesus guy, but has he written, directed, and starred in his own movie? Zach Braff writtenguyjesus Compared to my talents, Whoopi Goldberg is like one of those fake plastic Buddhas you get at dollar stores. I mean really, I fail to see the humor in an overweight negro woman with dreadlocks, no eyebrows, and is named after a childish term for flatulence. Zach Braff eyebrowsfakemean My mother's a psychologist, my stepfather's a psychologist, my stepmother is a therapist and my dad's a lawyer. So it was all prominent in my life. I don't know anyone who doesn't know someone on some form of prescription medicine. Zach Braff medicinedadmother I always encourage over-tipping if you can afford it because share the wealth. Zach Braff tippingwealthshare Sometimes Sarah [Chalke] starts to talk about Iraq or whatever and she gets all excited, like I actually give a crap what she's saying. Come on, she's a woman. But still, it's very cute. Zach Braff iraqcutegiving I wouldn't call myself a modern Shakespeare, but Shakespeare was probably to his generation what I am to mine. Zach Braff modernminesgenerations It depresses me when people expect me to be like the characters I play on film. I'm not some whiny loser punk, I'm a man's man. Zach Braff depressingcharactermen
