My way of joking is to tell the truth. It is the funniest joke in the world. George Bernard Shaw More Quotes by George Bernard Shaw More Quotes From George Bernard Shaw The secret of being miserable is to have the leisure to bother about whether you are happy or not. The cure is occupation. George Bernard Shaw The reasonable man adapts himself to the world the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man. George Bernard Shaw If you have an apple and I have an apple and we exchange these apples then you and I will still each have one apple. But if you have an idea and I have an idea and we exchange these ideas, then each of us will have two ideas. George Bernard Shaw Use your health, even to the point of wearing it out. That is what it is for. Spend all you have before you die and do not outlive yourself. George Bernard Shaw The only man who behaves sensibly is my tailor he takes my measure anew every time he sees me, whilst all the rest go on with their old measurements, and expect them to fit me. George Bernard Shaw There are two tragedies in life. One is not to get your heart's desire. The other is to get it. George Bernard Shaw If you have an apple and I have an apple and we exchange apples then you and I will still each have one apple. But if you have an idea and I have an idea and we exchange these ideas, then each of us will have two ideas. George Bernard Shaw This is the true joy in life: Being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one. Being thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the scrap heap. Being a force of Nature, instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances, complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy. George Bernard Shaw What is life but a seires of inspired follies The difficulty is to find them to do. Never lose a chance it doesn't come every day. George Bernard Shaw Hegel was right when he said that we learn from history that man can never learn anything from history. George Bernard Shaw Lack of money is the root of all evil. George Bernard Shaw Let a short Act of Parliament be passed, placing all street musicians outside the protection of the law, so that any citizen may assail them with stones, sticks, knives, pistols, or bombs without incurring any penalties. George Bernard Shaw Martyrdom is the only way in which a man can become famous without ability. George Bernard Shaw The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it. George Bernard Shaw A life spent in making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent in doing nothing. George Bernard Shaw The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them -- that's the essense of inhumanity. George Bernard Shaw The 100% American is 99% an idiot. George Bernard Shaw Common sense is instinct. Enough of it is genius. George Bernard Shaw A learned man is an idler who kills time with study. Beware of his false knowledge it is more dangerous than ignorance. George Bernard Shaw Alcohol is a very necessary article... It makes life bearable to millions of people who could not endure their existence if they were quite sober. It enables Parliament to do things at eleven at night that no sane person would do at eleven in the morning. George Bernard Shaw
