Once you sleep on feathers you can't go back to sleeping on the floor. Lenny Bruce More Quotes by Lenny Bruce More Quotes From Lenny Bruce I wanted out of the navy so bad in '45, I faked homo to get a discharge. It didn't matter that the Germans surrendered, I knew we were heading to Japan and I was done with that scene. Lenny Bruce navyjapandone I'm sure that half the buzz from smoking grass was the fact that it was so illegal. Lenny Bruce buzzhalfsmoking There is only what is and that's it. What should be is a dirty lie. Lenny Bruce shouldlyingdirty I know what "custody" [of the children] means. "Get even." That's all custody means. Get even with your old lady. Lenny Bruce meankidschildren What you end up with is outrageousness without the laugh - comedy as electro shock therapy. Lenny Bruce comedyendslaughing I'll die young, but it's like kissing God. Lenny Bruce addictionkissingyoung Satire is tragedy plus time. Lenny Bruce satirehuman-naturetragedy When you're eight years old, nothing is any of your business. Lenny Bruce eightyears I was a Jew talking about Goyim religion. If I had just stuck to Moses, everything would have been cool. But, copping to being part of the whole Christ murder conspiracy got everyone goose-stepping again. Lenny Bruce goyimmurdertalking If I get busted in New York, the freest city in the world, that will be the end of my career. Lenny Bruce cities-in-the-worldcareersnew-york ...Catholicism is like Howard Johnson, and what they have are these franchises and they give all these people different franchises in the different countries but they have one government, and when you buy the Howard Johnson franchise you can apply it to the geography - whatever's cool for that area - and then you, you know, pay the bread to the main office. Lenny Bruce governmentcountrypeople If you can take the hot lead enema, then you can cast the first stone. Lenny Bruce stoneshotfirsts The crooks downtown figured out that comedy is like a hammer. It can put up a barn and it can knock down a wall. So they bought it outright and marketed it as Comedy Central. Lenny Bruce barnscrookswall TV is just advertising for your live gig, so I'm playing whichever show is gonna get me the biggest crowd. Lenny Bruce gigscrowdstvs There's always a down side with any freedom. It's not just homosexual freedom, but any sexual freedom comes at a price, and that is usually art. Lenny Bruce homosexualsidesart I credit the motion picture industry as the strongest environmental factor in molding the children of my day. Lenny Bruce environmental-factorscreditchildren You can't just run out and start the car until some cat invents a car. Lenny Bruce carcatrunning Even if you are Catholic, if you live in New York you're Jewish. If you live in Butte, Montana, you are going to be goyish even if you are Jewish. Lenny Bruce montanacatholicnew-york I want to perform an unnatural act. Lenny Bruce unnaturalwant Take away the right to say "f**" and you take away the right to say "f** the government." Lenny Bruce
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