Gretchen Rubin: One of the best ways to make yourself happy in the pre...

If I give more to myself, I can ask more from myself. Self-regard isn't selfish.

Gretchen Rubin

selfish asks giving

Sometimes, counter-intuitively, it's easier to make a major change than a minor change. When a habit is changing very gradually, we may lose interest, give way under stress, or dismiss the change as insignificant. There's an excitement and an energy that comes from a big transformation, and that helps to create a habit.

Gretchen Rubin

stress may giving

Often, if there's something that I want to do, but somehow can't get myself to do, it's because I don't have clarity. This lack of clarity often arises from a feeling of ambivalence - I want to do something, but I don't want to do it; or I want one thing, but I also want something else that conflicts with it.

Gretchen Rubin

clarity want-something feelings

I'm a person who's fine saying 'No.' I like saying to myself, "no gossiping," "no nagging."

Gretchen Rubin

nagging saying-no fine

We need to have intimate, enduring bonds; we need to be able to confide; we need to feel that we belong; we need to be able to get support, and just as important for happiness, to give support. We need many kinds of relationships; for one thing, we need friends.

Gretchen Rubin

support important giving

Some kind of clutter is difficult - letting go of things with sentimental value, sifting through papers - but some clutter I find very refreshing to clear. I drive my daughters nuts because I'm always wandering into their rooms to clear clutter.

Gretchen Rubin

daughter nuts letting-go

People are powerfully moved by imagination, belief, and knowledge. They can consider the past and future. They can make changes in their behavior out of reason, in a way that animals can’t do.

Gretchen Rubin

animal people past

Pouring out ideas is better for creativity than doling them out by the teaspoon.

Gretchen Rubin

pouring creativity ideas

I've noticed that a lot of people do much better when all their resolutions are framed as 'Yes.' Not something like, "I'm going to give up French Fries," but something like "I'm going to eat three vegetables every day." "I'm going to hug more, kiss more, touch more." "I'm going to listen to more music." They do better when they frame things in the positive. And I think this is just part of human nature.

Gretchen Rubin

kissing giving-up thinking

Turn off your email; turn off your phone; disconnect from the Internet; figure out a way to set limits so you can concentrate when you need to, and disengage when you need to. Technology is a good servant but a bad master.

Gretchen Rubin

email phones technology

Contemporary research shows that happy people are more altruistic, more productive, more helpful, more likable, more creative, more resilient, more interested in others, friendlier, and healthier. Happy people make better friends, colleagues, and citizens.

Gretchen Rubin

citizens creative people

Time waits for no ovary.

Gretchen Rubin

ovaries waiting

Working is one of the most dangerous forms of procrastination.

Gretchen Rubin

dangerous form procrastination

A book is a better way to develop a complicated idea, or to tell a big story and to show how ideas weave in and out of each other, which is something that comes up a lot in happiness because all these ideas are interconnected.

Gretchen Rubin

stories book ideas

A blog is something that, everyday there's a new thing and that's part of the fun of it, you're just constantly moving forward. A book really gives you more time to reflect and think hard on things very, very deep.

Gretchen Rubin

moving-forward fun book

What I've also noticed is the term happiness, or happy is intimidating to some people. Some people deny that it's even possible to be happy, or to achieve happiness. Happiness sounds like this magical destination that you arrive at and then everything is sort of solved, or it's different.

Gretchen Rubin

different sound people

Sometimes I think it's easier to think about being happier, for what ever that means to you then worrying about what is happiness and what would life be if I finally achieved this ultimate happiness?

Gretchen Rubin

worry mean thinking

People feel happier when they feel like they're progressing. When they feel like something in their life is growing or getting better.

Gretchen Rubin

progress get-better people

Happiness is hard because it's very subjective. I know the people that seem happiest to me, but whether they are actually - what they're really like inside is really hard to say.

Gretchen Rubin

subjective knows people

I used to be very disciplined about only buying three books ahead of what I was reading, but my husband corrupted me, and now I'm dozens ahead of myself!

Gretchen Rubin

husband reading book

One of the best ways to make yourself happy in the present is to recall happy times from the past. Photos are a great memory-prompt, and because we tend to take photos of happy occasions, they weight our memories to the good.