Only men you can count on these days are Ben and Jerry. Janet Evanovich More Quotes by Janet Evanovich More Quotes From Janet Evanovich Suppose I lay down on the pavement and you run over me a few times with my own car...just for old times. Janet Evanovich pavement car running That might work," I said. "I'm good at faking it." This led to a couple moments of uncomfortable silence from both of us. "You didn't mean... ?" Morelli asked. "No. Of course not." "Never?" "Maybe once." His eyes narrowed. "Once?" "It's all that comes to mind. It was the time we were late for your Uncle Spud's birthday party." "I remember that. That was great. You're telling me you faked it?" "We were late! I couldn't concentrate. It seemed like the best way to go. Janet Evanovich uncles party couple Nice dress you're almost wearing. You ever think about changing professions?" -Ranger Janet Evanovich nice dresses thinking I am not menopausal. I just wanted half an hour alone. Is that too much to ask? A crappy half hour! Janet Evanovich hours too-much half I'm so busy writing and editing two books a year that I don't have time for painting anymore. Janet Evanovich writing book years Valerie was crying, too. She was laughing and sniffling back sobs. “I’m going to marry my snuggy wuggums,” she said. Morelli paused, his fork halfway to the roast chicken platter. He slid his eyes to me and leaned close. “If you ever call me snuggy wuggums in public I’ll lock you in the cellar and chain you to the furnace. Janet Evanovich locks eye laughing Omygod, I haven’t got years. I’ll have to hide in the Bat Cave.” “Once you go to the Bat Cave it’s forever, babe.” Eeek. Janet Evanovich bats forever years I hung my head. Ranger was next on the list. “Yo,” Ranger said when he answered. “Small problem.” “No kidding. Your car just went off the screen.” “It sort of burned up.” Silence. “And you know that keypad you gave me? It was in the car.” “Babe. Janet Evanovich small-problems car silence Am I to assume you would rather not have us as clients?" "Let me think about that for a nanosecond," Dickie said. "Yes! Last time you were in my office you tried to kill me." "That's an exaggeration. Maim you, yes. Kill you, probably not." Janet Evanovich lasts office thinking Ranger’s gonna hate this,” Tank said. “Better to get shot than to have to explain the gate. Bad enough I got a horse that smells like his shower gel. Janet Evanovich smell horse hate He doesn’t look very smart,” Diesel said. “He’s not even giving me the finger.” “Can monkey’s do that?” Hal asked. Carl gave him the finger. “Cool!” Hal said. Janet Evanovich smart giving looks And something chocolate, of course. A meal was not a meal without some sort of chocolate for desert. Janet Evanovich desert chocolate meals Were really screwed up, aren't we?" "In a very large way. Janet Evanovich screwed-up way I don't feel so good." Lula said. And she farted. She squeezed her eyes shut tight and did a full minute-long fart. "Excuse me." she said. I was horrified and impressed all at the same time. It was a record breaking fart. On my best day, I couldn't come near to farting like that. Janet Evanovich records-breaking eye long I write to entertain. When people read one of my books I want them to finish with a smile on their faces, feeling a little bit better about themselves and the people in their lives. Janet Evanovich writing book people I'm for sure a workaholic. I'm a complete control freak and I take on way too many projects. Janet Evanovich workaholic freak way By about the sixth romance I knew I wasn't in exactly the right place. I liked writing action. And I wanted to write a book with a little more edge than I was allowed in romance. Janet Evanovich romance writing book When you get ready to write your novel, outline it first. There's nothing worse than getting halfway through and realizing you've painted yourself in a plot corner. Janet Evanovich plot writing firsts Since I write in first person and have no idea what goes on in men's heads. Janet Evanovich writing men ideas I really wouldn't classify the books as mysteries. I prefer to say that they're adventures. Janet Evanovich mystery adventure book
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