People, generally, suck. Christopher Moore More Quotes by Christopher Moore More Quotes From Christopher Moore So I am death" Charlie said then turned to his daughter while buttering his toast. "This is death toast sweety. Christopher Moore charlie daughter said Advice, then, young yeoman: When referring to the king's middle daughter, state that she is fair, speculate that she is pious, but unless you'd like to spend your watch looking for the box where your head is kept, resist the urge to wax ignorant on her naughty bits." -Pocket I don't know what that means, sir." -Yeoman Speak not of Regan's shaggacity, son" [...] -Pocket Christopher Moore daughter kings mean Inside, I was like: "Ha, suck my spiky rubber strap-on, vampyre hunter! Christopher Moore rubber hunters Yo, yo, yo, check it out," said PJ, with enough hand gestures that any deaf person watching would have thought he had ASL Tourette's syndrome Christopher Moore pjs gestures hands We really have to get going," Sam said. "Can we leave the car here and pick it up later?" The monk said, "Does a dog have a Buddha nature?" Does a fish have a watertight asshole?" said Coyote. Christopher Moore coyotes car dog And he was like "The sedative in the blood, blah, blah, four hours, blah, blah, nerdspeak, geektalk -" -Abby Christopher Moore abby four blood I could stand on my head and flick the bean right there at the dinner table and my mom would be all, "Honey, Christmas is family time, we should be together" and make me finish in front of everyone. Christopher Moore mom would-be together I'm thinking of being a professional mourner. How hard can it be? Tear at your hair, sing a dirge or two, take the rest of the week off. Christopher Moore hair two thinking Theophilus Crowe's mobile phone played eight bars of "Tangled Up in Blue" in an irritating electronic voice that sounded like a choir of suffering houseflies, or Jiminy Cricket huffing helium, or, well, you know, Bob Dylan. Christopher Moore eight phones blue Chapter 8, Dinner With the Vampire: Is there something wrong with your food?" No, I'm just not very hungry." You're going to break my heart, aren't you? Christopher Moore vampire dinner heart Love is not something you think about, it is a state in which you dwell Christopher Moore marriage love thinking Charlie had Sophie strapped to his chest like a terrorist baby bomb when he came down the back steps. She had just gotten to the point where she could hold up her head, so he had strapped her in face-out so she could look around. The way her arms and legs waved around as Charlie walked, she looked as if she was skydiving and using a skinny nerd as a parachute. Christopher Moore nerd baby looks Next out of the hall came the sisters and their husbands. Before I could say anything, the captain had clamped his hand over my mouth and was lifting me off my feet as I kicked. Cornwall made as to draw his dagger, but Regan pulled him away. "You've just won a kingdom, my duke, killing vermin is a servant's task. Leave the bitter fool stew in his own bile." She wanted me. It was clear. Christopher Moore husband feet hands It was watching Madeline Alby eat cheese with every ounce of her being, like it was the first and best time, that made him realize that he had never really tasted cheese, or crackers, or life. And he didn't want his daughter to live that way. He'd moved her into her own room the night before...He hadn't slept well, and had gotten up five times during the night to check on her, only to find her sleeping peacefully, but he could lose a little sleep if Sophie could go through life without his fears and limitations. He wanted her to experience all the glorious cheese of life. Christopher Moore daughter sleep night From Dickens's cockneys to Salinger's phonies, from Kerouac's beatniks to Cheech and Chong's freaks, and on to hip hop's homies, dialect has always been used as a way for generations to distinguish themselves. Christopher Moore dialect hip-hop way You don't hurry a thinker, and you don't talk to him when he's thinking. It's just inconsiderate. Christopher Moore inconsiderate thinker thinking One day the good times had to keep on rolling, and all of life's horseshit would turn to circuses. Christopher Moore circus rolling one-day Winter near the shore is cold. The wind kicks up a salty mist and elephant seals come to shore to trumpet and rut and birth their pups. Retired people put sweaters on their lap dogs and drag them down the street on retractable leashes in a nightly parade of doggy humiliation. Surfers don their wetsuits against the chill of storm waves and white sharks adjust their diets to include shrink-wrapped dude-snacks on fiberglass crackers. Christopher Moore sharks dog winter An original thought would crack your feeble skull like a thunderbolt, you craven vulture. Christopher Moore original-thought cracks skulls Carlton Mellick III has the craziest book titles and the kinkiest fans! Christopher Moore titles fans book
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