Reality television is a scripted hyper-life that employs writers, but won't allow them to call themselves writers or join the union. Merrill Markoe More Quotes by Merrill Markoe More Quotes From Merrill Markoe You just never know when it might be cookie time. And, that is what the dogs have taught me. Merrill Markoe cookies dog might The day is divided into two important sections: Mealtimes and everything else. Merrill Markoe important divided two It's surely no accident that there are horoscopes in Vogue, Glamour, Mademoiselle, Woman, New Woman, Elle and Cosmo ... but not Sports Illustrated, GQ, Esquire, Field & Stream or Guns & Ammo. Merrill Markoe gun fields sports my mother ... took the fact that my taste differed from hers as a personal insult. Merrill Markoe taste mother facts They were soul mates, my mother and father. They claimed to adore each other, as if the word 'adore' meant 'argue with ceaselessly. Merrill Markoe soul mother father As you can imagine this is a very emotional moment for me because Dave promised me many times that I was the only woman he would ever cheat on. Merrill Markoe imagine emotional moments We are pretty sure that we and our pets share the same reality, until one day we come home to find that our wistful, intelligent friend who reminds us of our better self has decided a good way to spend the day is to open a box of Brillo pads, unravel a few, distribute some throughout the house, and eat or wear all the rest. And we shake our heads in an inability to comprehend what went wrong here. Merrill Markoe intelligent dog home I don't like the celebrity gossip culture, and I certainly don't want to contribute to it. I don't care about the Kardashians, or any of them. Merrill Markoe celebrity-gossip care culture A wacky, trendy outfit on a guy over 40 indicates he's got big issues. Merrill Markoe issues bigs guy Conversely, beware the man who does nothing but ask you questions about yourself and offers no information about himself. Not only is he keeping you at bay, he is probably not listening to your answers. Merrill Markoe listening doe men Beware the old man in young guy's clothes. If he's over 35 and comes to pick you up looking as though he's headed for a skateboarding competition while you are dressed to go to a nice restaurant, this is not a good sign. Merrill Markoe clothes nice men I am deeply grateful for the life I do have. In many ways, I am very fortunate. Merrill Markoe fortunate grateful way It's just like magic. When you live by yourself, all your annoying habits are gone!. Merrill Markoe magic acceptance inspirational In a way, watching an attractive, potentially dangerous guy play guitar is a little like watching a tiger agree to do tricks for his trainer. You know that they could just turn and kill you. But you're so flattered and pleased that instead they agreed to stand on a decorative box and wave and count for the crowd that for a while you forget how big the scary part of them really is. Merrill Markoe guitar guy play our culture is definitely the eighth grade. It's run by eighth-grade boys, and the way these boys show a girl they like her is by humiliating her and making her cry. Merrill Markoe girl running boys Reality TV has managed to commodify everything we used to think of as the elements of normal life. Merrill Markoe elements reality thinking Men, as a general rule, shy away from therapy because there is no obvious way to keep score. Merrill Markoe shy men way The whole narcissism and echo syndrome is usually the result of early childhood training. Those are very hard habits for anyone to break. Merrill Markoe childhood training echoes Whatever behavior you've experienced from people in the past, expect them to do it again and again and again. Merrill Markoe behavior people past Of the things I know to be true in life, right at the top of the list of irrefutable truths is, "No one ever listens to anyone." It might even be No. 1. Merrill Markoe truth-is lists might