The abused children are alone with their suffering, not only within the family, but also within themselves. They cannot crate a place in their own soul where they could cry their beart out. Alice Miller More Quotes by Alice Miller More Quotes From Alice Miller One can only remember what has been consciously experienced. Alice Miller has-beens remember The true opposite of depression is not gaiety or absence of pain, but vitality: the freedom to experience spontaneous feelings. Alice Miller pain opposites depression If a mother respects both herself and her child from his very first day onward, she will never need to teach him respect for others. Alice Miller mother children needs It is very difficult for people to believe the simple fact that every persecutor was once a victim. Yet it should be very obvious that someone who was allowed to feel free and strong from childhood does not have the need to humiliate another person. Alice Miller strong simple believe The grandiose person is never really free; first because he is excessively dependent on admiration from others, and second, because his self-respect is dependent on qualities, functions, and achievements that can suddenly fail. Alice Miller achievement quality self Those children who are beaten will in turn give beatings, those who are intimidated will be intimidating, those who are humiliated will impose humiliation, and those whose souls are murdered will murder. Alice Miller soul giving children The truth about childhood, as many of us have had to endure it, is inconceivable, scandalous, painful. Not uncommonly, it is monstrous. Invariably, it is repressed. To be confronted with this truth all at once and to try to integrate it into our consciousness, however ardently we may wish it, is clearly impossible. Alice Miller childhood wish trying Emotional access to the truth is the indispensable precondition of healing. Alice Miller emotional truth healing Experience has taught us that we have only one enduring weapon in our struggle against mental illness: the emotional discovery and emotional acceptance of the truth in the individual and unique history of our childhood. Alice Miller unique acceptance struggle For some years now, there has been proof that the devastating effects of the traumatization of children take their inevitable tollon society--a fact that we are still forbidden to recognize. This knowledge concerns every single one of us, and--if disseminated widely enough--should lead to fundamental changes in society; above all, to a halt in the blind escalation of violence. Alice Miller fundamentals children years We produce destructive people by the way we are treating them in childhood. Alice Miller childhood people way Without realizing that the past is constantly determining their present actions, they avoid learning anything about their history. They continue to live in their repressed childhood situation, ignoring the fact that is no longer exists, continuing to fear and avoid dangers that, although once real, have not been real for a long time. Alice Miller real long past Children who are respected learn respect. Children who are cared for learn to care for those weaker than themselves. Children who are loved for what they are cannot learn intolerance. In an environment such as this, they will develop their own ideals, which can be nothing other than humane, since they grew out of the experience of love. Alice Miller respect love children If it's very painful for you to criticize your friends - you're safe in doing it. But if you take the slightest pleasure in it, that's the time to hold your tongue. Alice Miller gossip real-friends friendship Child abuse damages a person for life and that damage is in no way diminished by the ignorance of the perpetrator. It is only with the uncovering of the complete truth as it affects all those involved that a genuinely viable solution can be found to the dangers of child abuse. Alice Miller abuse ignorance children Learning is a result of listening, which in turn leads to even better listening and attentiveness to the other person. In other words, to learn from the child, we must have empathy, and empathy grows as we learn. Alice Miller learning education children Where there had been only fearful emptiness or equally frightening grandiose fantasies, an unexpected wealth of vitality is now discovered. This is not a homecoming, since this home has never before existed. It is the creation of home. Alice Miller vitality fans home It is possible to resolve childhood repression safely and without confusion - something that has always been disputed by the most respected schools of thought. Alice Miller childhood confusion school Problems cannot be solved with words, but only through experience. Alice Miller experience problem The results of any traumatic experience, such as abuse, can only be resolved by experiencing, articulating, and judging every facet of the original experience within a process of careful therapeutic disclosure. Alice Miller abuse judging process
