The ashes of your existence will fertilize the soil for the unive... by Richard Kadrey

The ashes of your existence will fertilize the soil for the universe to follow.

Richard Kadrey

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Categorized in : Existence Ashes Soil

There are two Venices I know about and one of them is a hotel in Vegas. The other is an L.A. beach where pretty girls walk their dogs while wearing as little as possible and mutant slabs of tanned, posthuman beef sip iced steroid lattes and pump iron until their pecs are the size of Volkswagens.

girl dog beach

I've come a long way to get nowhere at all, I thought. And I've s... by Richard Kadrey

I've come a long way to get nowhere at all, I thought. And I've spent everything I have to get here.

long-way long way

Let me make sure I have this straight. The cavalry just now rode into town and it's a Czech Gypsy porn-star zombie killer. Have I got that right?

zombie killers stars

That's what Glocks are. High-precision killing machines that scre... by Richard Kadrey

That's what Glocks are. High-precision killing machines that scream "Daddy Issues.

daddy machines issues

Try not to sing too many sad songs for yourself. The universe already hates you. Self-pity isn't going to help.

hate self song

We must always look after our friends, even when they are foolish... by Richard Kadrey

We must always look after our friends, even when they are foolish. Especially when they are foolish.

foolish looks

...playing with the Barbie-size keyboard on my new phone. Phones are like toys now. They fit in your pocket, light up and vibrate like joy buzzers. Plus, you can get-I mean, "access"-the Internet and find anything you want. Music. Maps. Porn. Anything. If cell phones came with a cigarette dispenser, they'd be the greatest stupid invention ever.

phones stupid mean

All losers are romantics. It's what keeps us from blowing our bra... by Richard Kadrey

All losers are romantics. It's what keeps us from blowing our brains out.

sunset loser brain

If his drunkenness had legs, it would be Alexander the Great and conquer the known world. Then it would puke for a week into a solid gold toilet it stole from Zeus's guest room.

gold would-be rooms

Twenty percent? What am I, your waiter? I got you five vampires,... by Richard Kadrey

Twenty percent? What am I, your waiter? I got you five vampires, not a BLT.

vampire waiter twenties

In this life, no matter what anyone promises you, what allegiances of love or fealty they swear or what gods they pray to, you will never have more than what you have at this moment.

praying matter promise

If I learned anything Downtown, it's this: the only real difference between an enemy and a friend is the day of the week.

differences real enemy

I'm steel-toed boots in a ballet-slipper world. by Richard Kadrey

I'm steel-toed boots in a ballet-slipper world.

slippers ballet world

When you're born in a burning house, you think the whole world is... by Richard Kadrey

When you're born in a burning house, you think the whole world is on fire. But it's not.

fire house thinking

The universe is a meat grinder and we're just pork in designer shoes, keeping busy so we can pretend we're not all headed for the sausage factory. Maybe I've been hallucinating this whole time and there is no Heaven and Hell. Instead of having to choose between God and the devil, maybe our only real choice comes down to link or patty?

shoes choices real

God is the great janitor of the universe. Why things don't work is that we have a janitor in charge, and we keep looking for the landlord.

janitor landlord universe

Chasing a burning girl down a city street is a lot harder than it sounds. Civilians tend to stop and stare and this turns them into human bowling pins. Slow whiny bowling pins.

girl cities sound

I tap a Malediction out of the box, fire it up, and puff. It tastes like a tire fire in a candy factory next door to a strip club. The best cigarettes ever.

puff fire doors

The place looks like where David Lynch would meet Beaver Cleaver's mom for secret afternoons of bondage and milkshakes.

mom secret looks

I guarantee you I'm not going to forget your voice. We're going to run into each other down the road sometime, and when we do I'm going to pop you apart one rivet at a time." "There's the monster. Hello, monster.

voice monsters running