The notion that the maternal wish and the activity of mothering are instinctive or biologically predestined is baloney.

Betty Rollin

Categorized in : Wish Notion Mothering

Biological possibility and desire are not the same as biological need. Women have childbearing equipment. For them to choose not to use the equipment is no more blocking what is instinctive than it is for a man who, muscles or no, chooses not to be a weightlifter.

block mom mother

Scratch most feminists and underneath there is a woman who longs to be a sex object. The difference is that is not all she wants to be.

feminist differences sex

[On her mastectomy:] Fact is, I'm the same car I always was, exce... by Betty Rollin

[On her mastectomy:] Fact is, I'm the same car I always was, except now I have a dent in my fender.

cancer car facts

Disease may score a direct hit on only one member of a family, but shrapnel tears the flesh of the others.

disease tears may

in my mother's ferocious striving to give me 'everything,' she had never considered that giving me 'everything' would make me (1) different (from her), and (2) guilty (about what I got). Different and Guilty are not the stuff on which comradeship is built.

different mother giving

unlike a disappointing marriage, disappointing motherhood cannot... by Betty Rollin

unlike a disappointing marriage, disappointing motherhood cannot be terminated by divorce.

disappointing divorce motherhood

[On her mastectomy:] Pity is delicious. I was crazy about the pity I got. It was the best kind, too. I did not get, nor did I want, the drooling, mewing kind. I preferred something more restrained but deep-felt. Quality pity.

quality crazy want

... to be afraid is in a way to be hopeful, because to be afraid means that you haven't given up. You know it doesn't help, but you keep thrashing. The monster has you pinned to the wall, but you're not ready to say, 'Oh, hell, eat me.

hopeful wall mean