The truth is, whoever I've dated, if I've ever wanted to talk about them on stage, I've asked them first, and I've gotten their permission to tell a story or talk about them before I do it.

Amy Schumer

Categorized in : Firsts Stories Truth Is

I say if I'm beautiful. I say if I'm strong. You will not determi... by Amy Schumer

I say if I'm beautiful. I say if I'm strong. You will not determine my story - I will.

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When you're pregnant, like I am, and you wan na put your socks on, it's easy. First, the left foot, okay a little discomfort but not really a problem... then the right foot.

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That's why we both wanted to talk about it because it's been totally positive, i think a lot of people resist getting diagnosed and even some of their children because of the stigma that comes along with it.

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I think there are a lot of people with autism who go undiagnosed when I think their life could be better if they got those tools.

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I knew from the beginning that my husband's brain was a little different than mine, my husband was diagnosed with what used to be called Asperger's. He has autism spectrum disorder. He's on the spectrum.

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He keeps it so real, he doesn't care about social norms or what you expect him to say or do. If I say to him' Does this look like s ** t ?' he'll go' Yeah, you have a lot of other clothes, why don't you wear those ?'.

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This poor girl. Your wedding, everyone says it’s your day. It’s YOUR day. She’s like, no it’s not. She has to meet all these foreign dignitaries she’s never met before, there’s so much pressure ... can you imagine having a worse wedding?

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‘ If she’s asleep, that’s a no,'. by Amy Schumer

‘ If she’s asleep, that’s a no,'.

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I Feel Pretty, it was a perfect time. I was feeling really great about Amy Schumer. I met him when we were done filming. I felt really empowered and I loved Amy Schumer.

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I wish I could catch [ girls ] at that age right before somebody says the first mean thing to them, right before the first bully comes up and says something where you go,' Don't let them. Somebody is about to say something to you. Don't let that person question who you are. You know who you are, you're beautiful. Love yourself.' We need that as adults, too.

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I don’t think anyone wants to see Aziz’s career ruined or his life ruined or anything like that, but that’s where people’s minds go, they go, ‘Does he deserve this?’ And it’s really not about that. I think it’s about expressing and showing women that that behavior is not OK and not only can you leave, but you need to leave.

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If you have a doctor that makes you uncomfortable, or you get a massage, or you have a date with someone and they coerce you in a situation like the Aziz one, I don’t think there’s any sort of criminal charge, but I think that it’s good for everybody to learn that that behavior’s not acceptable, it’s not a crime, but it’s not cool. And it can still really mess with a woman.

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Of course, we’re in Florida, you’re going to boo, i know you’re here to laugh, but you choose how you’re going to live your life, and it’s just too important… Just so you know, from now on, if you yell out, you’re gonna get thrown out.

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Please turn your phone off. by Amy Schumer

Please turn your phone off.

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My heart goes out to Jillian and Mayci, to the survivors, to the families and everyone who was tied to the tragic, senseless and horrifying actions of this man who shouldn’t have been able to put his hands on a gun in the first place, i’m not sure why this man chose my movie to end these two beautiful lives and injure nine others, but it was very personal for me.

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The time is now for the American people to rally for these changes, these are my first public comments on the issue of gun violence, but I can promise you they will not be my last.

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I love this show. I'm a fan of the show, kaitlyn's( Bristowe) my favorite person that has ever been on the show, and I hope she finds love.

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At this point, Bill Cosby probably can't get in any legal trouble... by Amy Schumer

At this point, Bill Cosby probably can't get in any legal trouble, that's not what this is about.

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People do recognize me on the street, but I have the same friends, and I go to the same restaurants, my publicists want to kill me because I dress like a newly homeless runaway.

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They were right there! The epicenter of American (celebrity cultu... by Amy Schumer

They were right there! The epicenter of American (celebrity culture.) Gotta do it, it was the best.

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