There are really only so many foods and so many ways you can prepare them. Paula Poundstone More Quotes by Paula Poundstone More Quotes From Paula Poundstone The mistakes that I made I made because I drank too much. I don't think that's going to happen any more. Am I going to make mistakes as a parent? Sadly, every day. I'm looking around for the perfect parent and I haven't seen one yet. Paula Poundstone perfect-parentsmistakethinking I used to work at The International House of Pancakes. It was a dream, and I made it happen. Paula Poundstone dreamhousework I have a very silly sense of humor. I've never laughed harder in my entire life than seeing someone with toilet paper stuck on the bottom of their shoe. Paula Poundstone shoespapersilly I was the youngest in my family. When the other kids went to school, my mother would make them breakfast and then she would go back to bed for an hour, so I was sort of babysat by television. Paula Poundstone motherkidsschool I get the first flight out from anywhere I am because I have to come home to my kids. Paula Poundstone homekidsfirsts I have a horrible memory and I used to consider that a liability, but I've learned along the way that talking to people is really a beautiful thing. Paula Poundstone beautifultalkingmemories I don't have a bank account because I don't know my mother's maiden name and apparently that's the key to the whole thing right there. I go in every few weeks and guess. Paula Poundstone keysmothernames Once I was gone for a month and I was just miserable, so I flew back from Florida for two hours just to be home and see my cats. Paula Poundstone floridacathome I was born in Alabama, but I only lived there for a month before I'd done everything there was to do. Paula Poundstone alabamamonthsdone I have jokes I've told before and will tell again, but my favorite part of the night is talking to the crowd. Paula Poundstone crowdstalkingnight I love key lime pie, although it's never made the proper way. Paula Poundstone piekeysway I mean, I do love clever and witty, but I think that the 'Three Stooges' were geniuses. They'd have to be for their appeal to have lasted this long. Paula Poundstone cleverwittymean I used to watch 'The Waltons' and sob because my family was nothing like that. We had a cruel sense of humor in my family. Paula Poundstone sense-of-humormy-familywatches I only do two things in my life, and that's take care of my kids and work. Fortunately, these are my favorite things to do, so it works out. Paula Poundstone work-outtwokids My act is sort of improvisational. I have a skeleton in my head, but no fat or skin on it. Paula Poundstone fatsskeletonsskins The pleasure of the mulch pile is incomprehensible. I wouldn't care if they just hauled the mulch to the landfill somewhere. Obviously, grass clippings are biodegradable, but when they're bunched together at the landfill, they become badly influenced by other garbage. Paula Poundstone garbagecaretogether I talk to a lot of librarians, and there's always a steady drumbeat of how libraries are places of community. But a lot of them have also recently - and just in the nick of time - refurbished, because during this economic downturn, people have a tendency to borrow instead of buy. Paula Poundstone librarycommunitypeople When every high school graduate can spell the word, 'inauguration,' let's put lampshades on our heads and listen to his speeches until Obama's voice gives out. Paula Poundstone voicegivingschool When we save the rain forest, the polar bear, and Al Gore, we should party so hard that Canada calls the cops on us for noise. Paula Poundstone partynoiserain I happen to be a devout atheist. I don't believe in God. I still go to church -- I'm not a heathen. I go to an atheist church. We have crippled guys who stand up and testify that they were crippled, and they still are. Paula Poundstone guyatheistbelieve
