We are monkeys. We like to chatter. Chattering doesn't cost us anything. Terry Pratchett More Quotes by Terry Pratchett More Quotes From Terry Pratchett The intelligence of the creature known as a crowd, is the square root of the number of people in it. Terry Pratchett squares roots numbers Jesus won't cut you off before you're through With him you won't never get a crossed line, And when your bill comes it'll all be properly itemised He's the telephone repairman on the switchboard of my life. The phone line to the saviour's always free of interference He's in at any hour, day or night And when you call J-E-S-U-S you always call toll-free He's the telephone repairman on the switchboard of my life. Terry Pratchett cutting night jesus Light thinks it travels faster than anything but it is wrong. No matter how fast light travels, it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it. Terry Pratchett i-hate-you dark science If you don't turn your life into a story, you just become a part of someone else's story. Terry Pratchett fantasy-stories powerful life Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages. Terry Pratchett wages dream needs Any sensible ruler would have killed off Leonard, and Lord Vetinari was extremely sensible and often wondered why he had not done so. He'd decided that it was because, imprisoned in the priceless, inquiring amber of Leonard's massive mind, underneath that bright investigative genius was a kind of willful innocence that might in lesser men be called stupidity. It was the seat and soul of that force which, down the millennia, had caused mankind to stick its fingers in the electric light socket of the Universe and play with the switch to see what happened - and then be very surprised when it did. Terry Pratchett light play men Rincewind shivered. He was not, of course, an atheist; on the Disc the gods dealt severely with atheists. On the few occasions when he had some spare change he had always made a point of dropping a few coppers into a temple coffer, somewhere, on the principle that a man needed all the friends he could get. But usually he didn't bother the Gods, and he hoped the Gods wouldn't bother him. Life was quite complicated enough. Terry Pratchett atheist god life Botswana is also the only country in the world with a colour in its flag meant to represent rain (a sort of blue-grey). Not many people know this. Terry Pratchett rain blue country I saved a man's life once," said Granny. "Special medicine, twice a day. Boiled water with a bit of berry juice in it. Told him I'd bought it from the dwarves. That's the biggest part of doct'rin, really. Most people'll get over most things if they put their minds to it, you just have to give them an interest. Terry Pratchett dwarves medicine men Inside every sane person there's a madman struggling to get out," said the shopkeeper. "That's what I've always thought. No one goes mad quicker than a totally sane person. Terry Pratchett sanity mad struggle Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness. Terry Pratchett ankh light darkness Every intelligent being, whether it breathes or not, coughs nervously at some time in its life. Terry Pratchett breathe intelligent Insanity is catching. Terry Pratchett catching insanity It's hard to explain," said Brutha. "But I think it's got something to do with how people should behave... you should do things because they're right. Not because gods say so. They might say something different another time. Terry Pratchett different people thinking They say that the eyes of some paintings can follow you around the room, a fact that I doubt, but I am wondering whether some music can follow you for ever. Terry Pratchett eye doubt rooms Imagination, not intelligence, made us human. Terry Pratchett small-gods imagination made If you have let pride get the better of you, then you have already lost, but if you grab pride by the scruff of the neck and ride it like a stallion, then you may have already won. Terry Pratchett necks pride may Vampires have risen from the dead, the grave, and the crypt, but have never managed it from the cat. Terry Pratchett vampire graves cat Perhaps the magic would last, perhaps it wouldn't. But then again, what does? Terry Pratchett magic lasts doe I do note with interest that old women in my books become young women on the covers... this is discrimination against the chronologically gifted. Terry Pratchett aging discrimination book