What this country needs what every country needs occasionally is a good hard bloody war to revive the vice of patriotism on which its existence as a nation depends. Ambrose Bierce More Quotes by Ambrose Bierce More Quotes From Ambrose Bierce REFERENDUM, n. A law for submission of proposed legislation to a popular vote to learn the nonsensus of public opinion. Ambrose Bierce popular-vote learning law GRAPESHOT, n. An argument which the future is preparing in answer to the demands of American Socialism. Ambrose Bierce argument demand answers Homicide, /n./ The slaying of one human by another. There are four kinds of homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy, but it makes no great difference to the person slain whether he died by one kind or another - the classification is for the advantage of the lawyers. Ambrose Bierce differences suicide death Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure. Ambrose Bierce tyrants failure destiny INGRATE, n. One who receives a benefit from another, or is otherwise an object of charity. Ambrose Bierce ingrates benefits charity Perseverance - a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success. Ambrose Bierce perseverance congratulations success Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance. Ambrose Bierce devil distance technology Dawn: When men of reason go to bed. Ambrose Bierce insomnia sleep morning HAND, n. A singular instrument worn at the end of the human arm and commonly thrust into somebody's pocket. Ambrose Bierce arms pockets hands REASON, n. Propensitate of prejudice. Ambrose Bierce prejudice reason Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others. Ambrose Bierce consideration selfishness selfish Laughter, n. An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate noises. It is infectious and, though intermittent, incurable. Ambrose Bierce inarticulate laughter noise Abnormal, adj. Not conforming to standard. In matters of thought and conduct, to be independent is to be abnormal, to be abnormal is to be detested. Ambrose Bierce abnormal independent matter Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments. Ambrose Bierce three disappointment years History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools. Ambrose Bierce soldier lying history Liberty: One of Imagination's most precious possessions. Ambrose Bierce patriotic freedom imagination International arbitration may be defined as the substitution of many burning questions for a smoldering one Ambrose Bierce burning arbitration may A book which the Mohammedans foolishly believe to have been written by divine inspiration, but which Christians know to be a wicked imposture, contradictory to the Holy Scriptures. Ambrose Bierce christian believe book Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver. Ambrose Bierce owing-a-debt debtors ties Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder. This disease, like caries and many other ailments, is prevalent only among civilized races living under artificial conditions; barbarous nations breathing pure air and eating simple food enjoy immunity from its ravages. It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than to the patient. Ambrose Bierce temporary-insanity simple life