You are falling into your old error, Jeeves, of thinking that Gussie is a parrot. Fight against this. I shall add the oz. P. G. Wodehouse More Quotes by P. G. Wodehouse More Quotes From P. G. Wodehouse There are three things in the world that he held in the smallest esteem - slugs, poets and caddies with hiccups. P. G. Wodehouse caddiesthreegolf ...there occurred to me the simple epitaph which, when I am no more, I intend to have inscribed on my tombstone. It was this: "He was a man who acted from the best motives. There is one born every minute. P. G. Wodehouse tombstonesimplemen Judges, as a class, display, in the matter of arranging alimony, that reckless generosity which is found only in men who are giving away someone else's cash. P. G. Wodehouse divorceclassmen The trouble with cats is that they've got no tact. P. G. Wodehouse cattroubleanimal I don't want to wrong anybody, so I won't go so far as to say that she actually wrote poetry, but her conversation, to my mind, was of a nature calculated to excite the liveliest of suspicions. Well, I mean to say, when a girl suddenly asks you out of a blue sky if you don't sometimes feel that the stars are God's daisy-chain, you begin to think a bit. P. G. Wodehouse girlstarsmean That's always the way in this world. The chappies you'd like to lend money to won't let you, whereas the chappies you don't want to lend it to will do everything except actually stand you on your head and lift the specie out of your pockets. P. G. Wodehouse pocketswantworld To say that New York came up to its advance billing would be the baldest of understatements. Being there was like being in heaven without going to all the bother and expense of dying. P. G. Wodehouse dyingnew-yorkheaven Bicky rocked, like a jelly in a high wind. P. G. Wodehouse jellywind As a rule, you see, I'm not lugged into Family Rows. On the occasions when Aunt is calling Aunt like mastodons bellowing across premieval swamps and Uncle James's letter about Cousin Mabel's peculiar behaviour is being shot round the family circle ('Please read this carefully and send it on Jane') the clan has a tendency to ignore me. It's one of the advantages I get from being a bachelor - and, according to my nearest and dearest, practically a half-witted bachelor at that. P. G. Wodehouse auntcousinuncles [I'm] as broke as the ten commandments. P. G. Wodehouse psmithten-commandmentsbroke As a child of eight Mr. Trout had once kissed a girl of six under the mistletoe at a Christmas party, but there his sex life had come to abrupt halt. P. G. Wodehouse girlchildrensex What is Love compared with holing out before your opponent? P. G. Wodehouse what-is-loveopponentsgolf In every romance you have to budget for the occasional dust-up. P. G. Wodehouse occasionalromancedust I wonder what Tommy Morris would have had to say to all this number 6-iron, number 12-iron, number 28-iron stuff. He probably wouldn't have said anything, just made one of those strange Scottish noises at the back of his throat like someone gargling. P. G. Wodehouse irongolfnumbers I turned on the pillow with a little moan, and at this juncture Jeeves entered with the vital oolong. I clutched at it like a drowning man at a straw hat. P. G. Wodehouse tealittlesmen I love writing. I never feel really comfortable unless I am either actually writing or have a story going. I could not stop writing. P. G. Wodehouse storieswritingfeels ...smoking is just a habit. 'Tolstoy', she said, mentioning someone I hadn't met, 'says that just as much pleasure can be got from twirling the fingers'. My impulse was to tell her Tolstoy was off his onion, but I choked down the heated words. For all I know, the man might be a bosom pal of hers and she might resent criticism of him, however justified. P. G. Wodehouse criticismsmokingmen Whenever I have that sad, depressed feeling, I go out and kill a policeman. P. G. Wodehouse sad-depressedpolicemenfeelings He looked haggard and careworn, like a Borgia who has suddenly remembered that he has forgotten to shove cyanide in the consommé, and the dinner-gong due any moment. P. G. Wodehouse cyanidedinnerforgotten When a girl uses six derogatory adjectives in her attempt to paint the portrait of the loved one, it means something. One may indicate a merely temporary tiff. Six is big stuff. P. G. Wodehouse adjectivesgirlmean
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