Alas, we think of ourselves as unique entities-minds unlike any others-and thus we often reject the lessons that the emotional experience of others has to teach us. Daniel Gilbert More Quotes by Daniel Gilbert More Quotes From Daniel Gilbert In short, we derive support for our preferred conclusions by listening to the words that we put in the mouths of people who have already been preselected for their willingness to say what we want to hear. Daniel Gilbert support listening people When we have an experience -- hearing a particular sonata, making love with a particular person, watching the sun set from a particular window of a particular room -- on successive occasions, we quickly begin to adapt to it, and the experience yields less pleasure each time. Psychologists call this habituation, economists call it declining marginal utility, and the rest of us call it marriage Daniel Gilbert yield hearing making-love In short, if we adhere to the standard of perfection in all our endeavors, we are left with nothing but mathematics and the White Album. Daniel Gilbert albums perfection white Psychologists call this habituation, economists call it declining marginal utility, and the rest of us call it marriage. Daniel Gilbert utility psychologist economist Perceptions are portraits, not photographs, and their form reveals the artist’s hand every bit as much as it reflects the things portrayed Daniel Gilbert perception artist hands We humans can look deep into future and predict what will happen, but then turn around and do nothing about it. Daniel Gilbert environmental turns looks Reality' is a movie generated by our brains. Because we don't realize this, we are far too confident that the stuff appearing in the movie is actually 'out there' in the world when, in fact, it's not. Daniel Gilbert brain reality world Our inability to recall how we really felt is why our wealth of experiences turns out to be poverty of riches. Daniel Gilbert inability riches poverty Most of us appear to believe that we are more athletic, intelligent, organized, ethical, logical, interesting, open-minded, and healthy-not to mention more attractive-than the average person. Daniel Gilbert intelligent average believe Arthritic toothless people who love orgasms are more likely to reproduce than are limber, toothy people who do not. Daniel Gilbert toothless people Global warming is a deadly threat precisely because it fails to trip the brain's alarm, leaving us soundly asleep in a burning bed. Daniel Gilbert leaving bed brain Is happiness really the only thing we should be aiming for? Daniel Gilbert should The price we pay for our irresponsible explanatory urge is that we often spoil our most pleasant experiences by making good sense of them. Daniel Gilbert spoil pleasure pay To learn from experience, we must remember it, and, for a variety of reasons, memory is a faithless friend. Daniel Gilbert reason remember memories Happiness refers to feelings, virtue refers to actions, and those actions can cause those feelings. But not necessarily and not exclusively. Daniel Gilbert causes feelings happiness Because your brain uses information from the areas around the blind spot to make a reasonable guess about what the blind spot would see if only it weren't blind, and then your brain fills in the scene with this information. That's right, it invents things, creates things, makes stuff up! It doesn't consult you about this, doesn't seek your approval. It just makes its best guess about the nature of the missing information and proceeds to fill in the scene. Daniel Gilbert blind-spots missing brain The eye and brain are conspirators, and, like most conspiracies, theirs is negotiated behind closed doors, in the back room, outside of our awareness. Daniel Gilbert eye brain doors No one likes to be criticized, of course, but if the things we successfully strive for do not make our future selves happy, or if the things we unsuccessfully avoid do, then it seems reasonable (if somewhat ungracious) for them to cast a disparaging glance backward and wonder what the hell we were thinking. Daniel Gilbert likes self thinking I have everything that I could possibly want in life, from a gorgeous granddaughter and a wonderful wife, brilliant students, the best job anyone could hope for, and about half of my hair. Not the half I would have kept, but no one consulted me. Daniel Gilbert best-job hair jobs The mistakes we make when we try to imagine our personal futures are also lawful, regular, and systematic. They, too, have a pattern that tells us about the powers and limits of foresight in much the same way that optical illusions tell us about the powers and limits of eyesight. Daniel Gilbert patterns mistake trying