Beautifully shot, impeccably paced, it was a clear, unrelenting look at the National Trust, its friends and enemies, and it makes you want to burn your passport and beg the Luftwaffe to have another go. A. A. Gill More Quotes by A. A. Gill More Quotes From A. A. Gill I walk up a dune to a beach and look out to sea, but it's 100km away. The ships lie askew in their dry beds, at anchor for ever. Today is my son's birthday. Thousands of miles from here, his healthy lungs are blowing out candles. I should be there but I'm here with another boy, who puts his face close to mine and laughs. I smile back but realise he can't see it, because I'm wearing an antiseptic muzzles to protect me from his breath. A. A. Gill beach funny lying We like to see death as an unfair conspiracy, and what we want is a magic practitioner, a combination of Dr Watson and Sherlock Holmes. A. A. Gill insanity life death I still secretly believe that afternoons are the time for the test card and you shouldn't watch television when the sun is out. A. A. Gill cards watches believe America didn’t bypass or escape civilization. It did something far more profound, far cleverer: it simply changed what civilization could be. A. A. Gill profound civilization america A broadsheet obituarist once pointed out to me that veteran soldiers die by rank. First to go are the generals, admirals and air marshals, then the brigadiers, then a bit of a gap and the colonels and wing commanders and passed-over majors, then a steady trickle of captains and lieutenants. As they get older and rarer, so the soldiers are mythologised and grow ever more heroic, until finally drummer boys and under-age privates are venerated and laurelled with honours like ancient field marshals. There is something touching about that. A. A. Gill boys war peace Television in the 1960s & 70s had just as much dross and the programmes were a lot more tediously patronising than they are now. Memory truncates occasional gems into a glittering skein of brilliance. More television, more channels means more good television and, of course, more bad. The same equation applies to publishing, film and, I expect, sumo wrestling. A. A. Gill wrestling memories mean Nobody ever forgets their first night in the bush. It's among the precious, meagre handful of life firsts that remain indelible. A. A. Gill inspire night firsts All my life I've been aware of the Second World War humming in the background. I was born 10 years after it was finished, and without ever seeing it. It formed my generation and the world we lived in. I played Hurricanes and Spitfires in the playground, and war films still form the basis of all my moral philosophy. All the men I've ever got to my feet for or called sir had been in the war. A. A. Gill men philosophy war Americans think the only funny Brits are John Cleese, Benny Hill and whoever makes our toothpaste. They're not laughing with us, they are laughing at us. A. A. Gill laughing television thinking He (Jeremy Clarkson) is the last man standing on the beach commanding the glaciers' melt waters to go back A. A. Gill water men beach Celebrity is a national drama whose characters' parts and plots are written by the tabloids, gossip columnists, websites and interactive buttons. The famous don't actually have to turn up to their own lives at all. A. A. Gill character drama america Television gives us the gift to see ourselves as we'd like to be seen. A. A. Gill giving television Sport is how poor kids from poor countries pass through the eye of the needle to riches and recognition. A. A. Gill sports country kids Is it a particularly British trait to so utterly adore truly appalling men, from Tony Hancock through to Steptoe and Alf Garnett, Captain Mainwaring, Rigsby, Del Boy, Victor Meldrew and on to David Brent from The Office. The most deeply adored characters are all simply vile. A. A. Gill character men boys There were moments when I wondered at the gossamer veil that stops licence from being libel. I suspect that taking on the job of England manager puts you outside the protection of the courts. It must be part of the job description that you will be held hostage by media speculation and can have your character tortured, molested and finally executed at the public whim, in exchange for a lifetime's supply of money. A. A. Gill jobs football soccer
