Cell phones have gotten so small, you can't tell who's a cell phone user and who's a schizophrenic. Bob Newhart More Quotes by Bob Newhart More Quotes From Bob Newhart I think you should be a child for as long as you can. I have been successful for 74 years being able to do that. Don't rush into adulthood, it isn't all that much fun. Bob Newhart successful fun children I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down'. Bob Newhart music funny country Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on. Bob Newhart moving-on smile happiness People with a sense of humor tend to be less egocentric and more realistic in their view of the world and more humble in moments of success and less defeated in times of travail. Bob Newhart humble views people It's getting harder and harder to differentiate between schizophrenics and people talking on a cell phone. It still brings me up short to walk by somebody who appears to be talking to themselves. Bob Newhart phones cells talking Don't ever have two dogs. That way you won't know which one to blame. Bob Newhart dog two way Well, if you’re a native Chicagoan, you know how dumb he [Dr. Robert Hartley] is. He gets on the Ravenswood El, he goes past his stop on Sheridan Road, he gets off in Evanston, where the El is on the ground, and then he walks back 55 blocks to his apartment. Now, would you want to have that man as a psychologist? A man who misses his stop every day? Bob Newhart block men past Continuing to do stand-up is always a challenge because the audiences and the environments in which you work very often differ. Bob Newhart environment continuing challenges I still feel thirty, except when I try to run. Bob Newhart running fun trying I don't want to find the secret. I'm afraid all the joy will go out of it if I find the secret. Bob Newhart secret want joy I'm one of those passengers who arrives at the airport five or six hours early so I can throw back a few drinks and muster up the courage to board the plane. Apparently I'm not alone because I've never been in an empty airport bar. I don't care what time you get there. Even at 8:00 a.m. you have to fight your way to the bar. At that hour, everyone drinks Bloody Marys so no one can tell it's booze- at least until they fall off their chair. Bob Newhart airports fighting fall There's gratification in making somebody laugh. It's a wonderful sound. I find myself, to this day, doing it, wanting to make people laugh. Bob Newhart sound laughing people Marriage and fatherhood heighten the disillusion that we all think we are born handy. We confidently believe that we can fix things around the house, as if it's part of the collective brain that was further enhanced by eighth-grade shop class. Bob Newhart class believe thinking But I really believe that if you have the ability, there is an obligation to make people laugh Bob Newhart laughing believe people Comedians are never really on vacation because you're always at attention... that antenna is always out there. Bob Newhart vacation comedian attention I am a minimalist. I like saying the most with the least. Bob Newhart introvert minimalist quiet I think that what comes through in Chicago humor is the affection. Even though youre poking fun at someone or something, theres still an affection for it. Bob Newhart chicago fun thinking I think one reason for a successful marriage is laughter. I think laughter gets you through the rough moments in a marriage. Bob Newhart laughter successful thinking I think everyone probably starts out sounding like someone else, but gradually you develop your own sound. Bob Newhart sound thinking I'm most proud of the longevity of my marriage, my kids, and my grandchildren. If you don't have that, you really don't have very much. Bob Newhart grandchildren marriage kids
