Everybody will die, but very few people want to be reminded of that fact. Daniel Handler More Quotes by Daniel Handler More Quotes From Daniel Handler I'm jealous of your hooks," Kevin replied. "Having no hands is better than having two equally strong hands." Don't be ridiculous," one of the white-faced women replied. "Having a white face is worse than both of your situations." But you have a white face because you put makeup on," Colette said, as Sunny climbed back out of the trunk and knelt down in the snow. "You're putting powder on your face right now. Daniel Handler makeup jealous strong If you enjoy books with happy endings than you are better off reading some other book. Daniel Handler happy-endings reading book Life isn't fair," he said, in his undisguised voice, and for once the Baudelaire orphans agreed with every word the man said. Daniel Handler baudelaire voice men Nowhere in the world is safe," Count Olaf said. Not with you around," Violet agreed. I'm no worse than anyone else," Count Olaf said. Daniel Handler olaf safe world It is very frustrating not to be understood in this world. If you say one thing and keep being told that you mean something else, it can make you want to scream. But somewhere in the world there is a place for all of us, whether you are an electric form of decoration, peppermint-scented sweet, a source of timber, or a potato pancake. Daniel Handler sweet mean world For some stories, it's easy. The moral of 'The Three Bears,' for instance, is "Never break into someone else's house.' The moral of 'Snow White' is 'Never eat apples.' The moral of World War I is 'Never assassinate Archduke Ferdinand. Daniel Handler apples white war One of the world's most tiresome questions is what object one would bring to a desert island,because people always answer "a deck of cards" or "Anna Karenina" when the obvious answer is "a well equipped boat and a crew to sail me off the island and back home where I can play all the card games and read all the Russian novels I want. Daniel Handler games islands home Grief, a type of sadness that most often occurs when you have lost someone you love, is a sneaky thing, because it can disappear for a long time, and then pop back up when you least expect it. Daniel Handler sadness grief love-is It is almost as if happiness is an acquired taste, like coconut cordial or ceviche, to which you can eventually become accustomed, but despair is something surprising each time you encounter it. Daniel Handler acquired-taste despair happiness Your initial opinion on just about anything may change over time. Daniel Handler first-impression opinion may Figuratively, they escaped from Cout Olaf and their miserable existence. They did not literally escape, because they were still in his house and vulnerable to Olaf's evil in loco parentis ways. Daniel Handler olaf evil house In love, as in life, one misheard word can be tremendously important. If you tell someone you love them, for instance, you must be absolutely certain that they have replied "I love you back" and not "I love your back" before you continue the conversation. Daniel Handler someone-you-love important love-you Santa Claus has nothing to do with it," the latke said. "Christmas and Hanukah are completely different things." "But different things can often blend together," said the pine tree. "Let me tell you a funny story about pagan rituals. Daniel Handler different together tree It is a miracle if you can find true friends, and it is a miracle if you have enough food to eat, and it is a miracle if you get to spend your days and evenings doing whatever it is you like to do, and the holiday season - like all the other seasons - is a good time not only to tell stories of miracles, but to think about the miracles in your own life, and to be grateful for them, and that's the end of this particular story. Daniel Handler true-friend holiday grateful Every last souvenir of the love we had, the prizes & the debris of this relationship, like the glitter in the gutter when the parade has passed, all the everything & whatnot kicked to the curb. Daniel Handler gutters glitter lasts the mind has a thousand eyes, and the heart has one:yet the light of a whole life dies when love is done. Daniel Handler eye heart love But just suddenly I really, really needed to see you again right that minute, that night. Daniel Handler you-again minutes night Numbersign questionmark you" and "Asterisk exclamation point the world. Daniel Handler exclamation exclamation-points world You may be right,' she said, a phrase which here meant 'I’m wrong, but I don’t have the courage to say so. Daniel Handler phrases said may Every new promise was like something heavy I had to carry, with no place to put anything down. Daniel Handler like-something heavy promise