For a few minutes, everything is so cute that the mind reels.... And then, believe it or not, things get worse. So I shot myself. Dorothy Parker More Quotes by Dorothy Parker More Quotes From Dorothy Parker Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both. Dorothy Parker usualwittyorder Don't look at me in that tone of voice. Dorothy Parker voicehumorouslooks Q: What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? A: You can't hear an enzyme. Dorothy Parker hormonesenzymesdifferences Every year, back comes Spring, with nasty little birds yapping their fool heads off and the ground all mucked up with plants. Dorothy Parker womenmemorablespring Heterosexuality is not normal, it's just common. Dorothy Parker heterosexuality-isdiversitynormal A hangover is the wrath of grapes. Dorothy Parker grapeshangoverwrath If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? Dorothy Parker valentines-dayanniversaryfunny There's a hell of a distance between wisecracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words. Dorothy Parker womendistancefunny Vice is nice, but liquor is quicker. Dorothy Parker virtuenicevices If all the young ladies who attended the Yale promenade dance were laid end to end, no one would be the least surprised. Dorothy Parker yalewould-besex I hate almost all rich people, but I think I’d be darling at it. Dorothy Parker hatepeoplethinking Those who have mastered etiquette, who are entirely, impeccably right, would seem to arrive at a point of exquisite dullness. Dorothy Parker exquisiteetiquettemanners Telegram to a friend who had just become a mother after a prolonged pregnancy: Good work, Mary. We all knew you had it in you. Dorothy Parker motherpregnancyfriendship I hate writing, I love having written. Dorothy Parker writtenhatewriting Genius can write on the back of old envelopes but mere talent requires the finest stationery available. Dorothy Parker envelopesgeniuswriting This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force. Dorothy Parker readingbeerbook Now I know the things I know, and I do the things I do; and if you do not like me so, to hell, my love, with you! Dorothy Parker kick-asshelllove-you Honesty means nothing until you are tested under circumstances where you are sure you could get away with dishonesty. Dorothy Parker where-you-arehonestymean Daily dawns another day; I must up, to make my way. Though I dress and drink and eat, Move my fingers and my feet, Learn a little, here and there, Weep and laugh and sweat and swear, Hear a song, or watch a stage, Leave some words upon a page, Claim a foe, or hail a friend- Bed awaits me at the end. Dorothy Parker sweatsongmoving By the time you swear you're his, Shivering and sighing. And he vows his passion is, Infinite, undying. Lady make note of this -- One of you is lying. Dorothy Parker marriagelovefunny
