Have you ever seen people so ugly that you have to get someone else to verify it? Jeff Foxworthy More Quotes by Jeff Foxworthy More Quotes From Jeff Foxworthy You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat. Jeff Foxworthy redneck ostriches cowboy You might be a redneck if you own all the components of soap on a rope except the soap. Jeff Foxworthy redneck rope might You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded. Jeff Foxworthy redneck class school You might be a redneck if getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck. Jeff Foxworthy redneck tanks office If the gas pedal on your car is shaped like a bare foot, you might be a redneck. Jeff Foxworthy redneck car feet You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold. Jeff Foxworthy bingo redneck grandmother You might be a redneck if you dated your daddy's current wife in high school. Jeff Foxworthy redneck daddy school You might be a redneck if you're moved to tears every time you hear Dolly Parton singing I Will Always Love You. Jeff Foxworthy redneck singing love-you You might be a redneck if you grow Vidalia onions, rather than considering them a gourmet item. Jeff Foxworthy gourmet redneck onions You might be a redneck if your Momma would rather go the racetrack than the Kennedy Center. Jeff Foxworthy redneck your-mom might You might be a redneck if you can tell your age by the number of rings in the bathtub. Jeff Foxworthy redneck age numbers You might be a redneck if your momma gives you tips on how to sneak booze into sporting events. Jeff Foxworthy redneck events giving I'm two decisions away from putting up drywall for a living. I am, and there's nothing wrong with that, but whatever I got, it's through the grace of God, and I've got to use it right. Jeff Foxworthy decision grace two You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips. Jeff Foxworthy redneck house watches You might be a redneck if directions to your house include turn off the paved road. Jeff Foxworthy redneck house might You might be a redneck if you think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test. Jeff Foxworthy redneck trials thinking You might be a redneck if your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool. Jeff Foxworthy redneck telephones coffee You might be a redneck if the Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice. Jeff Foxworthy redneck shopping home You might be a redneck if the dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house. Jeff Foxworthy redneck dog house In my life, I have driven some crappy vehicles. But I have never been so desperate for a vehicle that I wanted a used rental car. Jeff Foxworthy desperate driven car