I am always joking and always clowning, giving and helping. Red Buttons More Quotes by Red Buttons More Quotes From Red Buttons Captain Hook's mother, who said to Little Hook, For God sakes, don't scratch it! Never got a dinner! Red Buttons hookscratchesmother Moshe Dayan, who said to Sammy Davis, Jr., That's funny, to me you only look half Jewish. Never got a dinner! Red Buttons dinnerhalflooks Long John Silver's wife, Short, who said to John, If the shoe fits... Never got a dinner! Red Buttons shoeswifelong Moshe Dayan, who donated his eye to CBS. Never got a dinner! Red Buttons his-eyesdinnereye Joseph Cotten, who said, You know how I got my name? Sammy Davis picked it for me. Never got a dinner! Red Buttons dinnernamessaid Lot, who said to his wife as she was being turned into a pillar of salt, Stop shaking! Never got a dinner! Red Buttons saltdinnerwife If I lose show business - I'll really be an orphan! Red Buttons show-businessorphanshows Clint Eastwood's sex therapist, who said to Clint, Do it any which way you can, but no sudden impact. Never got a dinner! Red Buttons dinnerimpactsex The Puerto Rican doctor, who wrote all his prescriptions with spray paint. Never got a dinner! Red Buttons dinnerdoctorspaint Sydney Poitier, who said to Lester Maddox, Guess who's not coming to dinner? Never got a dinner! Red Buttons sydneydinnersaid Dean Martin's pancreas, who overheard his liver singing I got a right to sing the blues. Never got a dinner! Red Buttons dinnersingingpancreas Dinah Shore? Wonderful woman. Dinah formed a foundation to locate missing senior citizens by putting their pictures on prune juice bottles. Red Buttons foundationseniormissing He's a real loser. He moved into a new neighborhood and got run over by the Welcome Wagon. Red Buttons Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. Red Buttons handyourneverkids Then, there was Cary Grant. He spent three hours a week in hospitals teaching nervous people how to eat jello. Red Buttons eathowthreepeople I'll tell you the truth; I wanted to leave me for Sid Caesar. Red Buttons leavemeyoutruth
