I am what is called a professor emeritus—from the Latin e, 'out,' and meritus, 'so he ought to be. Stephen Leacock More Quotes by Stephen Leacock More Quotes From Stephen Leacock Now, the essence, the very spirit of Christmas is that we first make believe a thing is so, and lo, it presently turns out to be so. Stephen Leacock christmas essence believe It may be those who do most, dream most. Stephen Leacock success inspiring inspirational How strange it is, our little procession of life! The child says, "When I am a big boy." But what is that? The big boy says, "When I grow up." And then, grown up, he says, "When I get married." But to be married, what is that after all? The thought changes to "When I'm able to retire." And then, when retirement comes, he looks back over the landscape traversed; a cold wind seems to sweep over it; somehow he has missed it all, and it is gone. Stephen Leacock growing-up retirement life In earlier times they had no statistics and so they had to fall back on lies. Hence the huge exaggerations of primitive literature, giants, miracles, wonders! It's the size that counts. They did it with lies and we do it with statistics: but it's all the same. Stephen Leacock science lying fall There are two things in ordinary conversation which ordinary people dislike - information and wit Stephen Leacock ordinary two people I detest life-insurance agents: they always argue that I shall some day die, which is not so. Stephen Leacock business life funny Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl. Stephen Leacock marriage girl love Hockey captures the essence of Canadian experience in the New World. In a land so inescapably and inhospitably cold, hockey is the chance of life, and an affirmation that despite the deathly chill of winter we are alive. Stephen Leacock nhl hockey winter Being a specialist is one thing, getting a job is another. Stephen Leacock specialists work jobs Advertising: the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it. Stephen Leacock animal-intelligence money fear I am a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it. Stephen Leacock motivational positive inspirational He flung himself from the room, flung himself upon his horse and rode madly off in all directions. Stephen Leacock economy horse rooms In ancient times they had no statistics so they had to fall back on lies. Stephen Leacock statistics lying fall If I were founding a university I would begin with a smoking room; next a dormitory; and then a decent reading room and a library. After that, if I still had more money that I couldn't use, I would hire a professor and get some text books. Stephen Leacock reading smoking book The Victorians needed parody. Without it their literature would have been a rank and weedy growth, over-watered with tears. Stephen Leacock growth tears literature You know, many a man realizes late in life that if when he was a boy he had known what he knows now, instead of being what he is he might be what he won't; but how few boys stop to think that if they knew what they don't know instead of being what they will be, they wouldn't be? Stephen Leacock men boys thinking The minute a man is convinced he is interesting, he isn't. Stephen Leacock wisdom men interesting Humour is essentially a comforter, reconciling us to things as they are in contrast to things as they might be. Stephen Leacock contrast humour might I owe a lot to my teachers and mean to pay them back some day. Stephen Leacock pay teacher mean Personally, I would sooner have written Alice in Wonderland than the whole Encyclopedia Britannica. Stephen Leacock encyclopedia-britannica carpe-diem ignorance
