I don't mind going back to daylight saving time. With inflation, the hour will be the only thing I've saved all year. Victor Borge More Quotes by Victor Borge More Quotes From Victor Borge I only know two pieces; one is 'Clair de Lune' and the other one isn't. Victor Borge pieces knows two When I was a little boy and played Liebestraum, my father used to hit me on the head with a newspaper every time I slopped the cadenza . . . I hate Liebestraum. Victor Borge hate boys father I wish to thank my parents for making it all possible? and I wish to thank my children for making it necessary. Victor Borge family sarcastic funny Well, all's fair in love, war and fooling the critics. Victor Borge music war funny (Responding to a sneeze from the audience) Who exploded? Victor Borge responding audience Read (this book), smile, enjoy, and if you happen to learn something along the way, don't get upset. Victor Borge reading funny book If I have caused just one person to wipe away a tear of laughter, that's my reward. Victor Borge laughter joy happiness (Referring to the piano's natural shape) Isn't it a shame when those big fat opera singers lean against the pianos and bend them? Victor Borge opera piano shapes Flint must be an extremely wealthy town: I see that each of you bought two or three seats. Victor Borge musical three two Many people have asked me why there are three pedals in these grand pianos. Well the pedal in the middle is there to separate the two other pedals. Victor Borge piano two people He was happily married - but his wife wasn't. Victor Borge sarcastic witty funny When an opera star sings her head off? she usually improves her appearance. Victor Borge music sarcastic funny My father invented a cure for which there was no disease and unfortunately my mother caught it and died of it. Victor Borge dad mother father It (the double-clarinet in India) was primarily used for snake charming, since the snake would do almost anything to get the Indians to stop playing it. Victor Borge snakes music humorous That's why I've never thought of retiring because I do it all the time whether on the stage or off. I found that in a precarious situation, a smile is the shortest distance between people. When one needs to reach out for sympathy or a link with people, what better way is there? Victor Borge distance people needs The elephant smoked too much.(explaining why the keys of his piano were so yellow) Victor Borge piano elephants keys There are three Bachs. Johann, Sebastian and Offen. Victor Borge three The first piano was built long after they didn't have any at all. Victor Borge piano long firsts I learned to play the piano on my mother's knee - that was before we got a piano. Victor Borge piano mother play The oboe sounds like a clarinet with a cold. Victor Borge oboes cold sound