I felt like Seth made a joke last night that was specifically from me, he said his monologue was like sending the first dog into space to see if it came back alive, and I did feel that way… I was like ‘I have to see what Seth says and how it’s received’… and I thank him for being that litmus test.

Jimmy Kimmel

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The Tonight Show's almost like you and President Obama left the door to the White House open and a bear got in.

The rest of the week I'm a glutton — pizza and pasta and steak. by Jimmy Kimmel

The rest of the week I'm a glutton — pizza and pasta and steak.

This is a very strange time in a America, our President is building walls and telling people to go back where they came from. With all that happening it's important to remember that many people still dream of becoming Americans. Every week immigrants from all around the world take the oath of citizenship.

Congratulations to our new fellow America citizens ! welcome to t... by Jimmy Kimmel

Congratulations to our new fellow America citizens ! welcome to this country.

It's horrible, nobody's doing anything about it at all and we seem to forget about these tragedies nationally four days after they happen.

You watch the news all day, you see what's going on, how do you walk on stage and ignore it ? It just doesn't work anymore, i wish I could. It's hard for me to talk about serious subjects. It takes a lot out of me. I do want to be funny. That's fun. It's not fun doing anything like that.

I think that they want to know what you think in the same way that when you interact with your friends they want to know what they think about things, i wish we didn't have to do it so frequently.

My hope, always, in situations like that, is... I know I don't have any thoughts that are new or groundbreaking and usually by the time we get on the air there's been 24 to 48 hours of news coverage, but to just remind people that 97 % of Americans believe that we should have background checks for purchases at gun shows and our politicians don't seem to care what we think anymore.

It's weird they don't have a better process for thinning the herd, have 30 years of reality TV taught the Democrats nothing ? You can't go from 20 candidates right to one. First you have to put them on an island and separate them into tribes.

You know, I was trying to lighten the mood. by Jimmy Kimmel

You know, I was trying to lighten the mood.

The fact that a group of Oscar winners eagerly agreed to play these iconic characters is a testament to the greatness of these shows and their creator, Norman Lear, to be a part of this is a dream come true for me and for everyone involved.

I think Donald Trump said that about Donald Trump taxes, too, so... by Jimmy Kimmel

I think Donald Trump said that about Donald Trump taxes, too, so we'll see.

I haven't been this confused about an ending since the series fin... by Jimmy Kimmel

I haven't been this confused about an ending since the series finale of' Lost,'.

He handed what turned out to be an Oscar-caliber role over to his friend and made a Chinese ponytail movie instead, and that movie,' The Great Wall,' went on to lose 80 million dollars. Smooth move, dumba **.

I'm just waiting for the right person, the right heart, i just ho... by Jimmy Kimmel

I'm just waiting for the right person, the right heart, i just hold a lot of value into it.

I mean, you've so famously and so powerfully said George( W.) Bush doesn't care about black people, it makes me wonder, what makes you think that President Donald Trump does... or any people at all ?

And then I was hit with the let's go to commercial break, that interview showed strong personalities with different opinions having a civil conversation.

She hates him the most, i would rather we had a chimpanzee as president of the United States. At least with a chimp there would be somebody to eat the bugs out of Rudy Giuliani’s hair.

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You know, it’s a funny thing. We all know, like even the people who like the president know he makes things up, but still, it’s weird to hear him tell a lie that’s specifically involves you, for the record, not only was I not on the sidewalk waiting for him, opening the door to his car, I did n’t even go to his dressing room to sell hello before the show. I never do. In 15 years, I probably, I do n’t know, I’ve done it like seven times.

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Donald Trump showed up one night outside our show banging on the backstage door. It was 2007, Donald Trump had a half-finished bucket of chicken under Donald Trump arm, donald Trump was screaming that Donald Trump needed to use the bathroom, but unfortunately, there was someone in the bathroom. I believe it wasZach Braffwho was in the bathroom. So Donald Trump took a look around, Donald Trump stuffed the remainder chicken in Donald Trump jacket, Donald Trump dropped Donald Trump pants … Donald Trump did Donald Trump business in the bucket.

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