Darynda Jones: I have depth. I've read Proust. No, wait, that was Pooh...

You rented the apartment with a dead guy in the corner?” I shrugged. “I wanted the apartment, and I figured I could cover him up with a bookcase or something.

Darynda Jones

bookcases apartment guy

You do have a tendency to severe spinal cords." "Only for you.

Darynda Jones

spinal-cord severe tendencies

When life hands you lemons say, "Lemons? What else have you got?" - bumper sticker

Darynda Jones

lemons bumper-sticker hands

I was just passing by. Saw the commotion. Figured you were involved.

Darynda Jones

passing-by passings saws

You still owe me a million dollars." I'd presented him with a bill for proving his innocence and getting him freed from prison. He had yet to pay. Couldn't imagine why. "Yeah, I was hoping we could work that out." "The interest alone is going to kill you." "What do you charge?" "Three hundred eighty-seven percent." "Is that ethical?" "It's as ethical as my dating the son of Satan.

Darynda Jones

dating dollars son

I'm a virgin. But this is an old shirt. --T-SHIRT

Darynda Jones

shirts t-shirt virgins

After searching for a space, I parked behind the tattoo parlor in front of a sign that said NO PARKING. Since it didn't specify to whom it was referring, I figured it couldn't possibly be talking to me.

Darynda Jones

tattoo space talking

Man, I want to be someone's forbidden fruit." "Well, you are pretty fruity.

Darynda Jones

fruit want men

Man, that woman was quick when she wanted to be. But put her behind the wheel of a Buick.

Darynda Jones

wheels wanted men

Honestly, he acted as though he didn't like me anymore. Wait, maybe he didn't. "Do you still like me?" "I never liked you." Oh, right. He had a point. Garreth & Charley

Darynda Jones

like-me honestly waiting

She blinked at me, then realized I was panicking. Honestly, it was like admitting to murder before being interrogated. “Ms. Davidson,” she began, but I decided to trip her up, to throw her off the trail of blood I’d left like an injured animal. “I don’t speak English.

Darynda Jones

speak-english animal blood

Having Reyes so near is painful. I think it has apoplexy." "Do you even know what that means?" "No, but it sounds serious. Like Ebola. Or hives

Darynda Jones

ebola mean thinking

I intend to live forever. So far, so good. - T-SHIRT

Darynda Jones

humorous birthday funny

I’m currently unsupervised It frisks me out too but the possibilities are endless

Darynda Jones

endless possibility

I noticed you tore down Donovan's house." He lifted his gaze until it locked with mine. "He's alive because he left town. His house chose to stay. It paid the price.

Darynda Jones

towns alive house

How would you like your eggs?" I tried. I really did. But I glanced at his crotch and it came out anyway. "Fertilized?

Darynda Jones

reyes-farrow charley-davidson eggs

I was white. Chalk had more color than I did. And quite possibly more personality.

Darynda Jones

color personality white

He had threatened my parents. I had to remember that. Still, it was really hard to stay mad at a wounded naked man.

Darynda Jones

mad parent men

You introduced me to Danger and Will Robinson, but you neglected to acquaint me with the other two.” “Fine,But you can’t make fun of their names. They’re very sensitive.” “I would never.” I pointed in the general vicinity of my left ovary, “This is Beam Me Up.” Then to my right. “And this is Scotty.

Darynda Jones

names fun two

You were the one who hit me on the roof? I hit you on the jaw. We just happened to be on a roof at the time.

Darynda Jones

roof happened

I have depth. I've read Proust. No, wait, that was Pooh. Winnie the Pooh. My bad" Charley Davidson.