I think people want to get married to end their emotional uncertainty. In a way, they want to end powerful feelings, or certainly the negative ones. Alain de Botton More Quotes by Alain de Botton More Quotes From Alain de Botton Memory is... similar to anticipation: an instrument of simplification and selection. Alain de Botton instrumentsanticipationmemories Only as we mature does affection begin to depend on achievement. Alain de Botton affectionachievementdoe Most of us stand poised at the edge of brilliance, haunted by the knowledge of our proximity, yet still demonstrably on the wrong side of the line, our dealings with reality undermined by a range of minor yet critical psychological flaws (a little too much optimism, an unprocessed rebelliousness, a fatal impatience or sentimentality). We are like an exquisite high-speed aircraft which for lack of a tiny part is left stranded beside the runway, rendered slower than a tractor or bicycle. Alain de Botton optimismlinesreality Forcing people to eat together is an effective way to promote tolerance. Alain de Botton tolerancefoodpeople The telephone becomes an instrument of torture in the demonic hands of a beloved who doesn't call. Alain de Botton telephonesbelovedhands True respectability stems not from the will of the majority but from proper reasoning. Alain de Botton reasoningstemmajority Differ though we might with Christianity's view of what precisely our souls need, it is hard to discredit the provocative underlying thesis, which seems no less relevant in the secular realm than in the religious one-that we have within us a precious, childlike, vulnerable core which we should nourish and nurture on its turbulent journey through life. Alain de Botton atheistjourneyreligious The mind may be reluctant to think properly when thinking is all it is supposed to do; the task can be as paralysing as having to tell a joke or mimic an accent on demand. Alain de Botton tasksmindthinking Curiosity takes ignorance seriously - and is confident enough to admit when it's in the dark. It is aware of not knowing. And then it sets out to do something about it. Alain de Botton ignoranceknowingdark What am I supposed to do here? What am I supposed to think? Alain de Botton thinking Arguments are like eels: however logical, they may slip from the minds weak grasp unless fixed there by imagery and style. Alain de Botton eelsstylemind The fear of saying something stupid (which stupid people never have) has censored far more good ideas than bad ones. Alain de Botton stupidpeopleideas In the gap between who we wish one day to be Alain de Botton envyanxietypain The finest proof of our loyalty toward one another was our monstrous disloyalties towards everyone else. Alain de Botton finestproofloyalty We envy only those whom we feel ourselves to be like; we envy only members of our reference group. There are few successes more unendurable than those of our close friends. Alain de Botton close-friendsenvygroups William James once made an acute point about the relationship between happiness and expectation. He argued that satisfaction with ourselves does not require us to succeed in every endeavour. We are not always humiliated by failing; we are humiliated only if we first invest our pride and sense of worth in a given achievement and then do not reach it. Alain de Botton achievementprideexpectations As victims of hurt, we frequently don't bring up what ails us, because so many wounds look absurd in the light of day. Alain de Botton lighthurtlooks Dreams reveal we never quite get 'over' anything: it's all still in there somewhere. Alain de Botton get-overstillsdream What is a snob? A snob is anybody who takes a small part of you and uses that to come to a complete vision of who you are. That is snobbery. Alain de Botton snobvisionuse Perhaps the easiest people to fall in love with are those about whom we know nothing. Romances are never as pure as those we imagine during long train journeys, as we secretly contemplate a beautiful person who is gazing out of the window – a perfect love story interrupted only when the beloved looks back into the carriage and starts up a dull conversation about the excessive price of the on-board sandwiches with a neighbour or blows her nose aggressively into a handkerchief. Alain de Botton falling-in-lovejourneybeautiful
