I think this dichotomy or opposition between work and play, between leisure and serious stuff, is definitely a bad way of thinking about the useful insights that play provides. Ian Bogost More Quotes by Ian Bogost More Quotes From Ian Bogost God will not speak to me and tell me to mow my lawn today. Ian Bogost lawns speak today If you start the day not really expecting substantial change, but anticipating some small new revelation or some small alteration, then over time you're able to find them in more places. Ian Bogost start-the-day revelations able To me, being able to find gratification in more venues, rather than greater gratification in a few, seems like a much more sane way of living. Ian Bogost venues able way We know exactly where the path to despair and insanity lies. It's in that sense that life is meaningless, there's nothing about today that's worth doing because it's just like yesterday and it's going to be just like tomorrow. Ian Bogost yesterday insanity lying Looking for meaning in the ordinary seems like the most urgent thing that we can do. Ian Bogost urgent can-do ordinary Forcing your spouse to stop doing that bad habit that drives you crazy, or making your kid be better at math or at art or at swimming, or making your parents or your in-laws not be annoying in the way that they're annoying, these are sometimes doomed goals. Ian Bogost crazy kids art There are personality traits, or baggage from their backgrounds, goals that they have and the first thing I need to do is understand and then acknowledge and then accept those properties. That's kind of the baseline requirement to have a productive relationship. Ian Bogost goal personality needs There are also many things my wife can't stand about me, and there are certain capacities that she has that are different than mine. The trick is to find compatibilities. Ian Bogost wife different capacity The playful perspective is not meant to turn your life into a game or a jungle gym. It's rather that the activity is looking outside of yourself. Ian Bogost turns perspective games I think the most important thing to realize about play is that it's this thing that's in stuff, it's not in you. Ian Bogost important play thinking We think we want enjoyment, and that enjoyment is incompatible with work, and somehow we have to import the pleasure into these miserable experiences. That takes for granted that there's not fun or play to be found in the work itself. Ian Bogost play fun thinking We have to always spread sugar on top of it in order that we can tolerate swallowing the things we're supposed to do, which is an incredibly depressing way of thinking about living your life. Not just that your work or your home life would be so miserable that you have to slather sugar on it, but then the sugar is all you're tasting. If that's the only way that I'm finding meaning, then we have this sort of mental diabetes that we're descending into. Ian Bogost depressing home thinking It's not even that finding laundry pleasurable or delightful should be our goal rather than finding television delightful. It's that both laundry and television can be delightful. Ian Bogost laundry goal television Once you get yourself on that path where you're willing to find something delightful in laundry and in dishwashers, it means that you train yourself to be able to find it almost anywhere in almost anything. Ian Bogost able path mean Wouldn't we all rather have the possibility of finding pleasure and delight in literally anything we might encounter? Instead of assuming that actually there are only these three things where pleasure and delight are possible. Like oh, it's television and socialization and work, and then everything else is the smoke I have to somehow choke my way through in order to get to the good parts. Ian Bogost encounters three order There are things about us that make us who we are, personality traits, or capacities that we have, or knowledge we possess or that we don't possess, habits we have that are good or bad. Ian Bogost who-we-are habit personality Normally if you're dating, you're looking for compatibility, and then the moment that there's incompatibility, you're like, "Well, swipe left on that, let's just keep looking." In some ways I think the same lessons apply to people that apply to objects. It's just much easier to see that lesson in things because they're these fixed intangible lumps of stuff. People are not. They can change. Ian Bogost dating people thinking My lawnmower can't change in the way that my son can or that I can. Ian Bogost cant-change way son The idea of thinking of our relationships with people as also being structured by limitations and constraints can be useful. Ian Bogost people ideas thinking This willingness to be frank and plain about the way that the world is, is a good first step. But that doesn't mean that you get what you want. Ian Bogost want mean world
