If someone you know is diagnosed with cancer, give them a call or send them a letter to tell them how sorry you are and to let them know how much you care. Mallory Ortberg More Quotes by Mallory Ortberg More Quotes From Mallory Ortberg There's simply no way you can tell a woman you work with that you disapprove of her relationship with her adult child, no matter how much you think it would be better for him to move out. Mallory Ortberg children moving thinking There are few things more disconcerting than realizing the first date you thought went so well was in fact a dud. Mallory Ortberg realizing facts firsts The hardest part about being ghosted is the fact that you can't deal with the ghoster directly. You just never hear from them again, and everything feels odd and incomplete. Mallory Ortberg hardest odd facts A woman who repeatedly asks a man she knows to be gay when he's going to get married and have children is not trying to let sleeping dogs lie. Mallory Ortberg dog lying children Periodontal bacteria can easily slip into the bloodstream and cause infection elsewhere in the body. Mallory Ortberg bacteria causes body Bad dental hygiene can lead to respiratory infections and an increased risk for heart disease and strokes. Mallory Ortberg hygiene risk heart Someone who has a disability is not necessarily in distress. You may be embarrassing and inconveniencing someone by butting in and making assumptions. Mallory Ortberg disability assumption may I love the art history ones because it's so little work for me. There's so many paintings that when I look at them, the look on the lady's face is like so clear and her body language and her posture or their physical situation is so immediately recognizable. Anyone who's been in a conversation they didn't want to have, or been getting harangued by a little kid they didn't want to pay attention to or been tired and wanted to go to bed is just like, "Yes, of course." Mallory Ortberg tired kids art It's so difficult to figure out how to offer support and also be honest with someone you love who's in a damaging relationship without making them feel defensive and retreating even further into isolation. Mallory Ortberg isolation honest support I hate to get gender essentialist, but I'm starting to think that a lot of married men have some sort of heterosexually induced dentistry aversion. Mallory Ortberg hate men thinking Someone who responds to "Please don't grope me" with whining and pouting isn't a friend. He's an asshole and a predator. Mallory Ortberg pouting predator whining You who have suffered so much do not want to be with the kind of person who makes "black widow" jokes to deal with an uncomfortable, painful moment. You should be with a person capable of great compassion and understanding. Mallory Ortberg black understanding compassion Addicts sometimes have a penchant for becoming the center of attention at other people's celebrations. Mallory Ortberg becoming attention people You can care very much about someone without being capable of becoming their primary caregiver in the event of their parents' untimely death. Mallory Ortberg events care parent Many fathers go their entire lives without announcing how sexy their son's old girlfriends are. Mallory Ortberg sexy girlfriend father You are allowed to draw lines even if your feelings are irrational. Part of the marvelous business of being an adult human is that you get to set your own boundaries for whatever reasons you like, without appending a sensible rationale to them. Mallory Ortberg lines adults feelings o one is right when it comes to destination weddings. It’s a big ask, requesting people take time off work and fly off to take a cruise just to see you get married, and they’re perfectly justified in saying no if they don’t have the time, the money, or simply the inclination. Mallory Ortberg cruise married people Nothing good comes of reading other people's emails. Mallory Ortberg email reading people There are alternatives to pregnancy if you want another child. Mallory Ortberg alternatives pregnancy children You have a right to be treated professionally at work, and it's your supervisor's job to make sure all their employees can perform their duties comfortably and safely. Mallory Ortberg supervisors duty jobs
