Imperfections are attractive when their owners are happy with them. Augusten Burroughs More Quotes by Augusten Burroughs More Quotes From Augusten Burroughs My thoughts seem thick, ketchup stuck in a bottle. Like trying to feel someone's face while wearing goosedown mittens. Augusten Burroughs mittens faces trying I know exactly how that is. To love somebody who doesn't deserve it. Augusten Burroughs deserve knows It was a salad bar of phobias Augusten Burroughs phobia salad bars And human instinct is ancient and reliable, utterly mysterious and possibly capable of great genius. I believe that refined, fluent instincts are a person's most valuable asset. My own instincts have repeatedly guided me against the grain of logic and probability. When I have trusted and followed their direction, they have never been wrong. I don't know how or why. But I know that every significant experience-positive or negative-sharpens them and makes them more accurate. Augusten Burroughs genius believe negative I was like a packet of powdered Sea Monkeys and they were like water. Augusten Burroughs monkeys sea water I was struck with a bolt of distilled horror like I have never known before. Far worse than suddenly finding yourself walking through a prison cafeteria wearing Daisy Duke shorts and a Jane Fonda headband. Augusten Burroughs finding-yourself cafeteria dukes I'm grateful for a lot of things. One is not being a drunk wreck. Or losing all four limbs in some ridiculous East Village bus accident that I was so destined for. Augusten Burroughs east drunk grateful I never question the way I write. Writing is the only thing that's without seams for me. It's an effort to talk because my pictures have to be turned into these sounds. It's an effort to be alive. It's work. But writing is wonderful. Augusten Burroughs effort alive writing It’s a wonder I’m even alive. Sometimes I think that. I think that I can’t believe I haven’t killed myself. But there’s something in me that just keeps going on. I think it has something to do with tomorrow, that there is always one, and that everything can change when it comes. Augusten Burroughs alive believe thinking The most mortifying fact of my life is something that happened when I was fourteen and I have never admitted to anyone: not to friends nor therapists; not even in rehab when we were detailing our own personal spirals of shame did I confess. It is this: I am a graduate of the Barbizon School of Modeling. Augusten Burroughs rehab facts school My window fogs and this makes me feel like there is no world outside of the car. Augusten Burroughs fog car world In some ways, blogging is like drinking - it gives a person permission to be a total asshole. Augusten Burroughs drinking giving way Perfection is the satin-lined casket of creativity and originality. If you are a perfectionist, at least stop telling everybody you're one and try to get over it yourself, alone in your home with the lights off Augusten Burroughs creativity light home I felt a bottomless sadness. So completely alone. Like one of my stuffed animals at home that I was too old for now, that sat on the shelf in my closet, mashed against the back wall. Augusten Burroughs wall sadness home We haven't slept together. But we've napped Augusten Burroughs havens together [Christmas] holidays are a heavy, heavy time. We make light of them with our red and green and our stockings and candy canes, but people think heavy thoughts over the holidays because that's when you're thinking about family. Are we close? Or are we not as close as other people? Augusten Burroughs holiday light thinking There is no such thing as too ordinary to write about, whether that's life or a scene in a novel. What's interesting to people, whether it's memoir or fiction, is the truth. Augusten Burroughs writing people interesting After was better. Before was only there so After could happen. Augusten Burroughs happens Dennis looked at the puppy in the window. We both did. It was the oddest thing. Normally, puppies in pet store windows sleep or pee or roll around on top of other dogs. This one ignored us its window-mates and was instead sitting with its nose pressed against the glass, looking at us with an extremely serious little expression on its face. An expression that seemed to me to be saying, "I am a sacred cow. Get out your wallet. Augusten Burroughs glasses dog sleep The most valuable moments and experiences that life has to offer are found only along its most treacherous paths. Augusten Burroughs moments path found
